#Monsterdon The homosexuality went to remarkably high levels. My my my.

Dracula: [bisexually] until **I** finish with him

#Monsterdon

Dude better get checked for concussions. He is losing waaay too much time.

#monsterdon

irl Palance gave up eating red meat after owning a ranch because he said he 'couldn't eat a cow'

#monsterdon

Alright I made the bread into rolls and because they were so rushed they're definitely going to be stodgy as fuck, but they'll be great vehicles for butter and stew. And the massive amounts of garlic will keep vampires away #monsterdon #dracula1974

#Monsterdon It is surreal watching on Tubi because we otherwise watch almost no video ads. And they are geo-targeted so uncomfortably "relevant".

three little brides of vlad are we

#monsterdon

The box there is for "take a corpse, leave a corpse" #monsterdon

That casket is in good shape for being around since the fifteenth century.

#monsterdon

"I must turn away. I faint at the sight of blood." - Dracula

#monsterdon #palanceIsDracula

You vs the portrait of the guy she told you not to worry about #Monsterdon

Play with us Johnathan. Play with us forever. #Monsterdon #Dracula1974

Interesting that this film doesn't seem to be taking visual cues from the 1922 film. The other two did. And so does the Bella Legosi film. That seems to be what you do if you're making a Dracula film.

Visually this one is going in a different direction #Monsterdon

this Johnathon looks like Frank from MASH #monsterdon

#Monsterdon ⚰️ 🧛‍♀️ 🦇 😱

Hey that hallway is awfully crooked is this castle gonna be ok?

Huh, this Drac keeps the dates he acquired his coffins?

#monsterdon #mastoween

#Monsterdon just what this movie needed to save it: *sexy vampire babes*

"...come play with us"

#Monsterdon #Dracula

For those who work back of house. #Monsterdon

Red satin to line the casket? Both cliched and hard to clean, boo.

#Monsterdon

Yes, I love the Jack in the old painting
#Monsterdon

Dude I don't care if you're on commission or not, you find a newspaper clipping of your girlfriend's circled face in your client's bedchamber *you leave.* #Monsterdon

Also love a good 70s horror movie music box #monsterdon

The mini-coffin is for his favourite vampire german shepard.

#monsterdon #Dracula1974

Someone up on their graces and social etiquette would not say "Count" to get his attention. It would be "My lord".
#monsterdon

It's my own damn fault for not making time to download.

#monsterdon
#Dracula1974

Look! It's Alice Cooper's bed!

#Monsterdon #Dracula

a big circle because that woman's CarFax report didn't come back clean. #monsterdon

Headcanon: That entire desk is just *full* of magical girl manga.

#monsterdon

get a handle on yourself my dog the first thing you are doing in the cobweb study is pouring a drink and the second thing is to play the obviously haunted music box. absolutely zero survival instinct #monsterdon

#Monsterdon ⚰️ 🧛‍♀️ 🦇 😱

"I'm sorry, I was reminded of an old shaving accident - I must now be alone!" <-- count Dracula, probably

SEVEN COMMERCIALS?!?!

Gonna have to skip to catch up. Again.

#monsterdon
#Dracula1974

"Just need to tip out the dead flies and then I can use this cup." True bachelor Jonathan Harker.

#Monsterdon #DanCurtisDracula

Ah yes, decorative suits of armor in the disused hallway, covered in cobwebs, we must be monsterdonning

#monsterdon

You're really gonna drink that!?

#monsterdon

I thought that in traditional lore Vampires are supposed to be kinda OCD why would Drag let his place get so far gone? #Monsterdon

(Shout out to all those who used the Queerest festival, Halloween, to come out)

#monsterdon #halloween

#Monsterdon sure mr harker, pour a drink. that's your answer to everything

"Strangely... rusty taste."

#monsterdon #Dracula1974

so there wasn't enough booze in Harker's room, he had to sneak into other parts of the castle for even older booze? #monsterdon

I'm looking for one of those 70s melted candle-in-a-Chianti bottle.

#Monsterdon

Director: Don't zoom in the frame too often, I want it to only be for effect

Cameraman zooming in every scene: cool yeah got it, only when necessary

#Monsterdon

@moira At least it's not knob and tube.

#Monsterdon

I do love a good dutch angle hallway shot #monsterdon

THERE'S some good spiderwebs. Aw yeah.

Still looks kind of like a nice historical site-turned-museum though. #Monsterdon

Well, now it has as many spiderwebs as my place, but it's still in better condition. ><

#monsterdon

Harker or Bertie? "A month?! "
#monsterdon

How rude. Yanking down draperies.

#monsterdon
#Dracula1974

The secret door, cleverly hidden in a spot where it is barely obscured by tapestries. #monsterdon

#Monsterdon ⚰️ 🧛‍♀️ 🦇 😱

can a person have carriage lag tho?

Hey #monsterdon have you done Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter yet... if not why not

Sorry Drac, didn't mean to ruin your fucking hangings. #monsterdon #palanceIsDracula

#Monsterdon #CoffeeWatch Update: No coffee sightings as of yet. Not a good sign.

Oh. Dracula like brunettes.
#Monsterdon #Dracula1974

oh yeah that's electric conduit

#monsterdon #Dracula1974

Palance keeps up a good gothic castle.

Weird his AirBNB isn't higher rated...

#monsterdon

THERE we go, at last some decent cobwebs. #Monsterdon

They're gonna wear out the zoom ring on the camera before this movie's done #monsterdon

Mr Harker is very rapidly vacillating between "I'm being kidnapped" and "everything's fine actually." Mood whiplash.

#Monsterdon #DanCurtisDracula

it should be a way bigger tipoff that this guys name is literally "count dracula" like havent this guy ever watched a movie before #monsterdon

Worst airbnb ever #monsterdon

@CactuarJoe I worry it'll be a no this time.

#monsterdon

"I got the munchies" #monsterdon

#Monsterdon I always feel a bit sorry for Harker. Such a young devoted worker willing to go on what was then quite a hazardous journey even if there weren't vampires on the other end!

Does Dracula prefer his necks shaved or hairy?

#Monsterdon #Dracula1974

I cannot lie, I would love to have a pocket watch like that.

#Monsterdon

"...what is it?"
"Oh nothing, just a touch of gas."

#Monsterdon #Dracula

#Monsterdon Uncomfortable close up.

So you think Curtis'll have the balls to make this gay? #Monsterdon

starting off with some music of the doggies #monsterdon

@morganmay the music box moment made me think of this

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon

"Now watch Dracula do one armed push ups!"

#Monsterdon Breaking the fourth wall Johnathan! Such a strumpet!

@brooke@bikeshed.vibber.net Count Dracula could not tell an Amontillado from a sherry!

#Monsterdon #DanCurtisDracula

He does look kind of yummy with the cut and shaving cream.

#Monsterdon

Is Harker getting high while Dracula rants? I mean that's one way to deal with having to listen to a megalomaniac...

Side note: if a vampire drinks blood form someone who is high (or drunk) do they get high? Modern fantasy books are divided on this issue.

#Monsterdon

Kthxbye.

#monsterdon
#Dracula1974

A month? Who's gonna feed my cat? #monsterdon

@moira he sounds a lot like my Texas great uncles 😅

#Monsterdon

At least he left you the booze, dude. #Monsterdon

The stag's head on the wall looks like he's judging every guest who comes in #monsterdon

#Monsterdon Harker: "Oh, (blush) he's not *my* Mr. Hawkins."

[lock clicks]

#monsterdon #mastoween

guy just bores the shit out of you with tales of """his ancestors""" all night and then just leaves with no further explanation. how rude. #monsterdon

I know we’ve done this story a few times already; does Jonathan usually sweeten the deal on Carfax by pointing out that Lucy lives nearby?

#monsterdon #Dracula1974

I can’t watch #monsterdon right now but I assume this is what’s happening

As Castles Dracula go, this one seems like a ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ castle. #Monsterdon

"No matter how manah tihams we were forced t'retreat" yeah a little cowboy is slipping out there, Jack.

#monsterdon #Dracula1974

Dracula: Tell me about this Carfax.

Jonathan: Interesting enough, he's a fox that sells cars.
#monsterdon

late to #monsterdon but starting now

#monsterdon Well you see you log onto carfax dot com and they'll tell you if the carriage you're going to by has been set upon by wolves, been in an accident or been previously torn apart by highwaymen...

Where did the framed pic came from? He had just arrived? #monsterdon #dracula1974

#Monsterdon All of 15 minutes in and Jack Palance is very Jack Palance.

Sorry, I was just having an attack of music box

#monsterdon #Dracula1974

this movie is also actually getting into the real estate deal and explaining what is going on with that. this might be the first dracula movie that i can actually follow #monsterdon

I’m not sure what Dracula is supposed to be experiencing as he looks at the photo but it mostly looks like Palance is about to sneeze. #Monsterdon

"What properties do you have that will interest me" sounds like a double entendre. Harker is thinking "properties = real estate," Dracula is thinking "the property of having a pulse." I really liked that line.

#Monsterdon

@JamesAkers *moonrays 😂

#Monsterdon #Dracula1974

@brooke we've gone from Zillow to Carfax

#dotcom #monsterdon