movie has given up on even trying us to convince that this day-for-night is nighttime

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon If you are watching this movie, I just want to remind you that your feelings are valid

Got to say traveling by Freight is not that much worse than economy class these days :blobcatbox: 🛫

#Monsterdon #CountDracula1970

They haven't really done much with Renfield yet he seems to just be some sort of strange handsomely-creepy looking sideshow I'm interested to know what he has to say besides wAAAAHaahahhahhh! #Monsterdon

Why do people keep staring into the camera in this movie? It's uncomfortable, stop staring at me you creeps. #Monsterdon

Hey Matt Berry is back!
. . . oh he doesn't get any lines.
#Monsterdon #CountDracula1970

there's 20 minutes of this left but the last 10 have felt like an eternity

#Monsterdon

"Are we ready?"

Sure, I'm unarmed and my friend has a weapon which famously does nothing to vampires. But we've both got bling, so let's go face the ancient horror <3 #Monsterdon

Always..... remember... to... drink... your Ovaltine. #Monsterdon #Dracula1970

#Monsterdon 🎵 i bit a girl and i liked it 🎵

i'm really not interested in what a guy who eats bugs has to say #monsterdon

very small gun for a "Cowboy American" from the original books....

#monsterdon

#monsterdon We are all channeling Renfield here

Just going to chew film for a few seconds here and drag things out well looking as bored as the audience

#Monsterdon #CountDracula1970

Okay, I know I'm that tiresome "it was better in the book" bitch, but it was better in the book. Then again, literally everything in this movie was better in the book. #Monsterdon

damn, that spike makes some serious kinda noise in her chest. is she made of oak or something? #monsterdon

@SesameSquirrel Probably not harpsichord but I'm going to keep saying harpsichord because it's fun, and also Tentacles taught us how awesome harpsichord riffs are

#Monsterdon

Quincy (Jack Taylor) played the priest of Thulsa Doom who tried to put the make on Conan. #monsterdon

#Monsterdon “You must obey me absolutely.” Dr. van Seward is kinky.

Well it's too late for Lucy, Dr. Hellsing. Not sure why you waited until she died to act. #monsterdon

Next scene: “So far, I’m right.”

Van Helsing is an asshole. #Monsterdon

Van Helsing, pioneering acupuncturist #monsterdon

the problem with litarally every vampire story is - why wouldn't you wanna be a vampire? being a vampire fucking rules

#monsterdon

the cameraman must have been paid by the zoom #monsterdon

Generally not a lot of children out at 1AM, are there...?

#monsterdon

@jonny If there were draculas today then there would be dracula wellness influencers telling you things like "DO NOT eat people who have eaten THESE FIVE FOODS !!! 😱 "

#Monsterdon

i know everyone's complaining about all the camera zooms but it's like the camera operator is doing everything they can to add any action to this film

#Dracula1970 #monsterdon #mastoween

@allanb you and me both

#Monsterdon

Oh no, the Bene Gesseritt have arrived. They heard about all these boxes Dracula has. Bene Gesseritt can never pass up a good evil box. #Monsterdon

Above the law?

What law is Count Dracula actually breaking? Has there been specific applicable statues for this situation? I don't think legislation is the way to go.

Wooden stakes people!!! Pitchforks!! Torches!!

#Monsterdon

I know Lucy is supposed to be a vampire now but the black and the skin-toned lipstick just makes her look like she's from a 21st-century fashion shoot #Monsterdon

still unclear how someone in town turning everyone into incredibly cool goths that are also bats is a problem #monsterdon

#Monsterdon Funeral, then straight to children playing, but it’s still dark out? Night for Day or something?

Interesting costume choice putting the "Lady in white" in a black dress. #Monsterdon #Dracula1970

Blue rubber ball in the late 1800s? #Monsterdon

Lucy makes a rather fetching vampire

#Monsterdon

Director’s trademarks: excessive zooming, running out of money, not making any sense

#Monsterdon #CountDracula1970

He fell that far onto concrete and then just sort of said, "Oog," and rolled over as if he'd tripped or fallen out of bed. #monsterdon

@Taweret I am suddenly so disappointed in the lack of cowboys in my Dracula movie 🧛‍♂️ 🤠

#Monsterdon #CountDracula1970

@adhdeanasl In the book, the brilliant & ambitious Dr. Seward was one of the several guys Lucy was flirting with / considering marrying before she got engaged to Lord Godalming (NOT Quincy Morris, the American, although he was one of her suitors too). #CountDracula #Monsterdon

Alas, sweet Lucy has become a big titty goth girlfriend #monsterdon

#monsterdon
It's handy to have the swing out bars in the windows...

Van Helsing had a book about Dracula the whole time...

...why did anything in this movie happen 🤦

#Monsterdon

Organ music FTW!
#monsterdon

In my search for the secrets for the black arts, I found this. May I share it? Van Helsing puts on a record. Blackstreet starts playing. #Monsterdon

and yet i feel i know him

biblically

#Dracula1970 #monsterdon #mastoween

lol yeah sure, vampires are terrified of cops #monsterdon

Is it me or is that blood too red? Like it looks arterial and there is no way vampires drink from arteries rather than veins. No unless the coagulant in their saliva is way beyond what I assumed it was.

#TooMuchScience #Monsterdon

"Perhaps it is not too late for me to act. "

Yeah only two of your patients have tragically died, you've still got dozens more. No rush.

#Monsterdon

not even a second of mourning for lucy. like did the other woman even get to tell them that she saw a guy turn into a bat #monsterdon

"It is a sign" Yeah and it reads "You're a REALLY SHITTY DOCTOR. #Monsterdon #Dracula1970

yes for the love of god please start acting

#Dracula1970 #monsterdon #mastoween

I also have my hair in an elaborate updo and wear a pink brocade robe when I am hanging out with the gals #monsterdon

"she's dead"
not for long.
#monsterdon

Put coins on here eyes!
#monsterdon

Camera operator suddenly realizes they're on the wrong side of the bed to film Dracula's arrival and awkwardly shuffles to the side. #monsterdon

Little known fact: Benjamin Button is a vampire movie
#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon badger badger badger badger

The filmmakers want you to be as interested in Lucy’s nostrils as they are. #monsterdon

It’s the worst when you fall 40 feet out of a window and land right on your funny bone. #Monsterdon

The doctor, in Lucy's room, with the candlestick!

#Monsterdon #CountDracula

#Monsterdon Lucy, your dark circles are taking up half your face. Get some sleep, gal.

This film is just CLOSEUPS and ZOOM-INS ON TEETH AND EYEBALLS #Monsterdon

LUCY is making the same face I make when I realize I have to clock back in on Monday. #Monsterdon

It's time to admit that Lucy has a drinking problem.

#Monsterdon

bars on window: you had ONE JOB

literally

#Monsterdon

if you were a dracula would you want to spread out your blood sources so you get a little blood from many people or would you want to cultivate a stable of blood people. there seem to be costs and benefits to both so i would bet dracula society would have a variety of strategies and customs across different cliques of draculas #monsterdon

#Monsterdon Renfield: no holds barred. (And no bars held.)

I think the blurry taxidermy fox in the background might be the creepiest thing in this movie #monsterdon

it's been an hour but I feel like the events that have taken place so far fit on a sticky note

#Monsterdon

Renfield falling from the window had very Monty Python energy.

#monsterdon

@diazona I think it's the only way I'd ever go up in a plane again. #monsterdon

honestly he could get all the drinks he could want if he'd just post FREE PALLETS U-HAUL FROM BASEMENT on craigslist

#Dracula1970 #monsterdon #mastoween

"I study Black Art". Dude you took that one art appreciation class in college.#monsterdon

men will do anything to justify a zoom lens purchase instead of going to therapy #monsterdon

Poor vampire got so tuckered out he couldn't even make it to his coffin bed.

#Monsterdon

lol @ Renfield falling from the asylum like a costume stuffed with rags....

#monsterdon

@Lazarou This sounds not dissimilar to the best of air travel

#Monsterdon

@blogdiva watching Attack of The Clones with the kid while I read #monsterdon threads tonight 🤝

#monsterdon Kinski is on a different movie and that is the movie I would have liked for it to be

OMG CLOSEUP ON A

metal bar

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon “I made a study of the black arts.” Ah, so he’s been to grad school.

Van Helsing looks out the window as he’s speaking, vaguely points as he says, “the mountains in the north…of Transylvania…”

Aren’t they back in England?

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon “Once as sane as you or I.” … not a high bar, there, doc.

I did not check "doesthedragonflydie dot com" tonight. ☹️

#Monsterdon #CountDracula1970

Being engaged doesn't make you the same blood type. #monsterdon

Now look, I'm not saying I want to stay in a padded room, but that looks *super* comfortable.

#Monsterdon

I don't like this part of fantasy Island.
#Monsterdon

@SRLevine To gain their life-force, per the book. Though really, he's supposed to feed the flies to spiders, feed the spiders to birds? rats? Something bigger, and then eat them. He got ahead of himself. #Monsterdon #CountDracula

None of the characters in this movie appear to have any introspection about what’s going on whatsoever. They’re just…there. Letting events happen to them.

#Monsterdon

This overdressed night guard at the asylum has weirdly Matt Berry energy.

#monsterdon

Klaus Kinski's 'mad delirium face' is just his 'innocent joy face'

#monsterdon

Theyre going to blow the speakers out of the surround. Why is it from 0db to Renfield screaming loud enough to break the sound barrier. #monsterdon

We don't *know* she's enthralled, who wouldn't let 1970s Christopher Lee bite them in a sensual manner

#Monsterdon

@Victorsigmoid Well I'm not joking about the death part so that's the risk...

Odds are more complex since some people can receive from everyone and some are more limited (and the blood type vs. +/- are two different issues) and I almost failed statistics and probability in college (which wasn't exactly recent). Someone else is going to have to do the math on this one.

#Monsterdon

Listen, if they gave Lucy a transfusion from her dude and then Dracula bit her, does that count as like an indirect kiss with her fiance? #Monsterdon

Hey, @Taweret gets her wish, time for more Klaus

#monsterdon

This got way sexier than I was prepared for. That bat can exanguinate with the best of them. #monsterdon

But donating blood is not a joke, consider donating a pint of blood today
Https://www.Redcrossblood.Org

#Monsterdon #CountDracula1970 #GiveBlood #Blooddrive #redcross

if you appear to me at my window as a bat and then transform into a guy i am at least going to hear you out #monsterdon