@RamenCatholic @CactuarJoe I like how this was conceived, written and filmed all within a few months in that Hollywood way they don't do anymore.
I don't know about you, but I greatly prefer the Space Cowboy (Jeff Goldblum) from the Planet Earth that showed up 4 years after this movie in THE ADVENTURES OF BUCKAROO BANZAI ACROSS THE 8TH DIMENSION
Edit: I have summarily tricked myself into re-watching BUCKAROO BANZAI, lol
I know I tooted this before, but it still entertains me today...
Several friends are always enjoying #Monsterdon on Sundays (well, my Mondays). Every Sunday-Monday night, my time line gets filled with all these Monster toots. And they're all hashtagged, to I could just filter them. But... I don't...
Even though I don't know the movies, even though I have no idea what they're Tooting about..... I love their enthusiasm! Their different perspectives and things they pick up from the movies they have watch together...
So folks, thanks for the funny, silly, and sometimes serious toots that fill my time line whenever you're "out with the monsters" again.
:BlahajHuggingHeart: keep it coming!
Sador is basically that billionaire who claims heβll live forever, but less creepy.
By far the weirdest thing about the movie was that there were one or two *actually really solid scenes in there.*
Like, Vaughn's death? That was good. Nestor's arm thing? Legitimately a solid idea. How they managed that while fucking up *literally every other part of the film* I have no idea. I am deeply confused. #Monsterdon
I love a good star war.
#monsterdon
The Golden Rule of Space Combat is "RAMMING SPEED"
Mom can we get a Star War?
Mom: You have Star War at home!
The Star War at home: #battlebeyondthestars
![[empty]](/media/avatars/287224a269fbaefbc7e94920b207f9dca8b6e0415d818373c9f1528359b6a0e8.jpg){kind=small}
Thank god they're killing everyone off
Okay, so we seem to all be agreed that the genuinely good parts of this movie are
- Robert Vaughn's death scene
- the white guys trying to remote-kill the bad guy via arm transplant
So bad it's good parts
- Saint X-Man the Boobtaculous
Noooooo not boob girl!
Space Conan throwing a spear and old man squinty got snuffed without Obi Wanβs disappearing act.
The slowly-rotating chainsaw is incredible. Technically completed prop.
lololol, stop hitting yourself, stop hitting yourself
#monsterdon
I'm confused, why does he need the arm?
OMG so Cameron made Total Recall to remake the effects he developed for this movie
gotta watch it next
THEY TWINKLED TO DEATH
#monsterdon
so, i take it they took arcade game seats to make the ships
No talk. Only pews!
#monsterdon there's been 0 dialogue for the last several minutes
#monsterdon They are cooking hot dogs by holding them next to the Kelvins. LOL
Back on their planet βhey what happened to the kidnapped bride?β
βUhhhhhβ
#monsterdon
#monsterdon We've got the oddest sausage-fest ever... lead by the Boobship.
So we have, the girl who knows about robots, the confederate cowboy, borg-lite, lizard & co, the war criminal of war criminals, and valkyrie?
I really donβt understand any of these charactersβ motivations AT ALL. It really should have been a tv series so they could explore motivation a bit more.
#monsterdon
The cowboy is from earth. That means he could conceivably be transporting The Cullens and not even know it.
That's a spray-on bra
nell, you fired off the lasers by yourself, why can't you put up the forcefield by yourself? #monsterdon
I have never participated in #monsterdon live, but this one would have been a great place to start, with Battle Beyond the Stars! A movie that came out when I was 11, and starring John Saxon, friend of Bruce Lee, and co-star in Enter The Dragon! I feel so left out while reading the commentary!
Alienβs henchmanβs clothing is certainly not disproving my belt theory
#monsterdon
Now the computerβs being nice to himβ¦ SHE THIRSTS FOR BLOOD
#monsterdon
I guess as someone from a sheltered pacifist background I am pretty shook with how these characters act so casually and quickly about life altering decisions
#monsterdon
"I didn't bring any weapons but my gaming station....."
Me: Because of the quality of this feature, there will be less snark and more intelligent conversation.
Monsterdon: No
#monsterdon And the doctor mounted in the tin can here strikes me as borrowing the character design from Dumont in TRON.
First of many, I'm sure. #Monsterdon
I PRESENT MY ORGANS TO YOU IN FRIENDSHIP!
gotta love those 'pew pew' noices....sucks there's no sound in Space really....
#monsterdon The SHAPE OF THIS SHIP. At first I thought it was just a silly yellow squash, but then when I got older a film studies aside pointed out the female shapes of that ship. Funny, gay boy doesn't get it. Thinks it's a squash. There's a bit of a lesson there... HAHAHAHAH.
#monsterdon SPACESHIP ZAP
Well this film is wasting no time in letting the audience know which characters are the aggressors.
#monsterdon James Horner did the music for this?!?!
Kicking off #monsterdon! This week it's "Battle Beyond the Stars" (1980). Get your timed mute buttons ready, or join in!
Remember the bit where Shad explains to whats-her-name that there's a planet where children can rot?
#monsterdon
@diazona Space comes at you fast! #monsterdon
hey wait, did the Kelvins ever revive after a nice float in the protein tank?
@davesdogmaggie @strangefour "14words" dude with the dixie flag on his ship.... #monsterdon
Well, the script was about what I'd expect from a Corman flick, but the VFX, SFX, score, spaceship & alien design were all pleasant surprises!
All in all, I give Space Boobs a solid space cayman's C+
Thanks everyone for joining in! Thanks @Taweret for hosting! Have a great week & see you next Sunday!
@Taweret@octodon.social I like how that leave us open to make our own final scenes, with sequel hooks!
Cunning
And boom - abrupt ending
awww, good wholesome (cheap) Space Opera fun!
Jump scare credits!
#monsterdon #battlebeyondthestars
lol, an AI that can't count, where do they get these ideas....
Sador's home culture didn't have a 'trojan horse' story in it, did it?
Use the force, Shad! The force. Trust your farm boy instincts!
the real sonic weapon was "Lazuliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii"
#monsterdon Did they tape Valkyrie's eyelids open or something? It is _quite_ unpleasant to see.
#Monsterdon might be my favorite line so far.. 'it is good to have skills' in response to this guy is about to torture you and he's an expert at causing pain
Gesture control seems like a bad way to control a chainsaw.
Classic "my grafted arm is trying to kill me" bit
So do the bad guys harvest body parts or whatβs their backstory, I wasnβt paying attention
#monsterdon
Dang, not the cowboy. (kicks rocks)
#Monsterdon
That's a lot of hot sauce on your face, Gelt. You okay?"
Bi Valkyrie's wardrobe is impractical for space combat but makes a statement
Maybe they should've deployed their glowing lethal-hug little-people a bit earlier
25 minutes left? Really?
RIP Space Moses.
#Monsterdon #BattleBeyondTheStars
The music is trying desperately to make the space fight scenes dramatic, but the effects aren't able to pull off the visuals.
Drones folks, you need drones.....
Extra points for flying through the big ship's central hole....
ahhh, the old 'lead the tracking missile back onto the enemy' routine
A closeup so hard, you can see all 2000 pores with shadows, caked in makeup
Rapid cuts! Just use rapid cuts! Everything'll work out if you just use rapid cuts! #Monsterdon
#monsterdon The Valkiri build their ships like Buick Cars. The seats are so sway-back that you might as well just take a nap, huh?
"errrr, thanks Earthman but you're too much of a ....'project' as the varda says"
@Taweret@octodon.social probably some cool shit
This is a literal sausage fest
LOL they're all chewing
Oh sadly the two ladies have set the #bechdelTest back a generation
Bechdel test clutches throat, falls to ground writhing, gasping for air
Welcome to some new 80,000 viruses in my mouth
uuurgghhh, "will you teach me how they fuck on your planet"
I'm glad she clarified. π€£ #monsterdon
ENOUGH, JESUS CHRIST
The belt is a joke right?
#Monsterdon
Good spaceship designs. #monsterdon
Valkyrie. #Monsterdon
@plantago "We're bored immortals looking for thrills!" deffo #monsterdon
omg that outfit
Does he have gold pressed latinum though?
And now it's space Avengers! Quite a range of participants in this flick.
so the white dudes are a shout out to Woody Allenβs Everything You Wanted To Know About Sex?
just sitting in a treasure room, as you do, when you're waiting for eternity