eggs?

#MOnsterdon

lol, still with the balding jokes......

#MOnsterdon

I recall seeing an ad for this film when I was young & never got around to watching it. Thanks for voting on it, #Monsterdon

Red flag, lady. Red flags galore!

#Monsterdon

Checkov's bomber, and checkov's methane pocket?

#monsterdon #alligator1980

So is the clock radio going to light the dynamite or

#Monsterdon

@randy_s "sometimes life throws you curve balls" #Monsterdon

Old guy with a walker finally makes his entrance.

#monsterdon

Let's split is RIGHT

#Monsterdon

nice classic sticks of dynamite....

#MOnsterdon

Best Lubriderm commercial ever

#Monsterdon

Some people are waaaaaaaaaay ahead of me. Mine only just jumped the alligator. #monsterdon

Oh no I forgot they did a scream loop in the wedding scene. I HATE THOSE #cannotstophearing #monsterdon

#monsterdon I think that's the most dead rich people etoufee we're going to see. Awww... Could have just lovingly dwelled, no fuss, no screaming, just let the big animal eat you. Shhh yes, shhh rich people. Let the killer alligator have you. WE ALL REJOICE.

Just let Ramon cook

#Monsterdon

MONSTER CHOMP

Unnamed trooper gets pulled out of the water sans legs! Welp I guess that counts as a small amuse-bouche for Ramon, or possibly a palate cleanser between courses as... yep, cut back to the wedding. Thank you, yes, excellent. Now all we need is a cut back to the bazookas we saw earlier.

C'mon, give the people what they want!

#monsterdon

That’s not how you scream when being bit in two. That was more of a “it burns when I pee” sound.

#Monsterdon

Slate mansion/stately Wayne Manor #Monsterdon

Driver's like, "Hold up, I wanna see where he's going with this." #Monsterdon

Okay you actually have his legs too close to the propellers but sure let's say the alligator did it

#Monsterdon #Alligator1980

MY GOD this guy is still going on his trauma dumping?
#monsterdon #alligator1980

This grilling scene is almost as awkward as the bowling scene from Werewolf of Washington. #Monsterdon

Time to cut bait, boys. #Monsterdon

you know what, never mind, I retract the question

Madison can do whatever he wants as long as he does it off screen while we watch Ramon grabbing snacks on legs

#monsterdon

#monsterdon I tihnk the Chief of Police would be best if he had like a massive coronary, how could you tell? Sounds like he's screaming about his heart with everything he says, so just close your eyes and imagine him gripping his chest.

Did Madison just decide to start using Marisa as a scratching post because he couldn't take out his frustration on his two ex-coworkers who surprised him in the restaurant there..? I'm struggling a little bit to make sense of that last scene. Did I miss something?

#monsterdon

He sure wears a lot of red for someone who just watches other people die all the time - WAIT A MINUTE

#Monsterdon #Alligator1980

I think the Chief is ready to explode.....

"SERENITY NOW!" dude

#Monsterdon

He was eaten whole in front of us.
We would imagine there would be not much of him left

#monsterdon

White people eating with chopsticks and nobody makes a big deal about it? 1980 cinema really was more 70s than 80s wasn't it. #monsterdon

@JoeWynne wait this is set in Chicago?

#Monsterdon #Alligator1980

MONSTER CHOMP

*Ramon inhales Brock more or less whole*

#monsterdon

This is the most amazing #Alligator. It's like 40 feet long, but it can move all over the city without anyone seeing it. Like some kind of ninja gator. Oooh, do I smell a sequel?
#monsterdon

@fabio I was wondering that too and my best guess is that it climbed in over the fence when we weren't looking and just sat there chilling for a while, waiting for a child to fall into its mouth. #monsterdon

Did they break up because he was momentarily stand-offish?

#Monsterdon

So much trash everywhere, does this city have no self respect? Is there a strike?

Well there goes the Big Game Hunter! lol!

#Monsterdon

"It's vision is based on sobriety. I'll be safe if I dull my reaction times by chugging from this flask"

#Monsterdon

Mm, Silva Snax #Monsterdon

"There's a heavy penalty in this life for fear." This movie has some gems. #monsterdon

Clever Girl in five... four... three... #Monsterdon

Heh. There's a kid doing crocodile shadows on the other end of the street :P #Monsterdon

@Ayyyydrew "Men would rather swear vengeance on a Alligator than..."

#Monsterdon

Detective Sweater Jacket and Reptile Science Master are on a date and have awkward romantic dialog to make the audience groan. After they do an off-screen sex, Detective Sweater Jacket talks about how his partner died to prove how noir his backstory is.

Reptile Science Master tries to make him feel better because it wasn't his fault, but then he gets cranky because she's playing with his hair and he's going bald I guess.

#monsterdon

We get another scene where evil rich people are having an evil rich people garden party.

Then its halloween and some kids are having a costume party, then one of them wanders outside, finds a giant alligator in the swimming pool and then is eaten by it.

#monsterdon

"Arthur is my number one boy, yes sir. *leers*" 😬

#monsterdon

ick #Monsterdon

He got the lease after Mitchell left town -_- #Monsterdon

Wait, did they just have sex?

#Monsterdon

Detective Sweater Jacket has no joined the Reptile Science Master and hard-hat co-worker from earlier to form a scooby doo team to search the sewers for the alligator. They find a dead dog because there are millions of dead dogs in this movie, its worse than the 1950s soviet space program. Anyway, this scares Co-Worker Hard Hat out of the scooby doo team, because he realizes that he's the least significant character and is probably the one most likely to die if this keeps up.

#monsterdon

Marisa the Herpetologist will soon be rechristened Marisa the Macroherpetologist

#monsterdon

Sociopathic children...

#Monsterdon

lol they're going to split up, too

#monsterdon

Detective Sweater Jacket and Reptile Science Master investigate the alligator more, learning that the evil scientists are making animals big with testosterone.

Then boss cop tells Detective Sweater Jacket that he's off the force because "he pushed too hard", which makes no sense on its own. My guess is that boss cop realized this is an 80s movie and it will take a Maverick Cop Who Was Pushed Off The Force (TM) to solve the reptile murders.

#monsterdon

Henry Silva to self....."Fuck. You were in The Machurian Candidate, Bro." #monsterdon

The guy with our two main characters is even wearing a red shirt....

#Monsterdon

Obviously I want a remake of this starring Michael Shannon as Adidas cop

#Monsterdon

HECKILOPTER VERSUS AGILLATOR

natural enemies for æons

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Just out of curiosity, is there a Chicago, California?

Hi there, I'm a palm tree. You may have noticed me before in an earlier scene

#monsterdon

So another Food of the Gods-type situation?

#Monsterdon

Soooo... Did we have another plot point to film, oooooor...? #Monsterdon

The giant alligator moving through the miniature set actually looks better than the effects in Godzilla (1998).

#Monsterdon #Alligator

How did I forget Henry Silva was in this #monsterdon

@binford2k

So you don't get swallowed down along with all that rich Corinthian leather

EDIT: dammit, forgot the "don't"

#Monsterdon

✅ Casual Sexism BOO

#Monsterdon

After the alligator escapes, Reptile Science Master makes casts of the alligator prints. Then the mayor appears to yell at the boss cop who is also grumpy.

The next day we are testing depth charges in a lake to hunt the alligator. Then an alligator hunter, who is less cool than Steve Irwin, appears and tries to flirt with the Reptile Science Master.

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Looks like the new meal has coiffed hair, and kind of a dick. Hope he gets eaten. They all need to be eaten. Covered in ketchup, anything to make the nasty long pigs more palatable to our hero, our buddy, the pure and innocent alligator. Humans are traaaaaash!

@fabio yeah, they've not been too shabby for Monsterdon

#Monsterdon

A young Megamind in an earlier role

#Monsterdon

The Lizard Lady does kind of have a sexy ring to it, Marisa.

#Monsterdon

If the safety of the public really mattered to you, you'd think twice about that moustache

#Monsterdon #Alligator1980

"Who's this pretty girl" just put this guy on the Rootin' to Get Chomped list

#Monsterdon

MONSTER CHOMP

ACAB (all cops are bitten)

#monsterdon

'Alligators!…come out and play-ay!!!'

#monsterdon #Alligator

"If we close the canals, we'll have a panic on St. Patrick's Day!"

#Monsterdon

Anyway, some kids are farting around in an alley when a giant alligator busts its way through the sidewalk, rendering my alligator search suggestions mute. The kids run away because they're not idiots.

Then some cop cars come to help and smash into other cars and explode. Mustache cop climbs out a window and then the alligator grabs his leg and eats it. One boy watches then runs away. The alligator waddles down the street in triumph.

#monsterdon

These street kids are taking this really well. Not even any screaming? They have Seen Some Shit #monsterdon

Pretty sure that was a racist cop....

...remember when each household just had one phone for everyone, and people would bicker over it's use? Fucking Dark Ages man.....

#Monsterdon

HERE IT COOOOOOMES

#monsterdon

Aaaah the 70s, when every car was a bomb waiting to happen. #Monsterdon

the alligator has learned to disguise itself as an army squad

#monsterdon

We set up a gun line at the end of the sewers where we think we're flushing the alligator too, but then we see the symbol bearing soldiers and they're like "hold your fire!" so they didn't flush out the alligator.

Naturally, the detective thinks its still out there but the boss cop wants to give up for no reason.

#monsterdon

We launch our romance subplot between Reptile Science Master and Grumpy Detective, when the former apologizes to the later for not believing him, and then reveals that she is the Little Girl With Pet Alligator from the first part of the movie (which was in the past). She also says that snakes are better pets than alligators.

#monsterdon

I hope he knows what a "southerly turn" is while deep underground

#Monsterdon #Alligator1980

Our anti-alligator strategy is to try to flush the alligator out by having soldiers bang trash can lids like cymbals, hoping it will spook the alligator down the sewers.

... which honestly is not the worst plan. That noise is irritating me as a movie audience, so it would probably irritate me as an audience.

#monsterdon

This marching band sucks.
#Monsterdon

Do you think anyone will notice if we just film by the craft services catering table

#Monsterdon

Because we paid for an army and the army had nothing to do, we send a bunch of soldiers to the sewers to hunt the alligators with literal anti-tank rockets.

Both the detective and the Reptile Science Master have been summoned as radio control people, for which they have donned Sweaters of Anti-Gator mission control.

#monsterdon

Somebody brought a camera to a battle of giant teeth

#Monsterdon #Alligator1980

#Monsterdon🐊 🐊 🐊 💩 🩸 😱

wow they connected the giant gator to all those other murders right away

Swat [dammit autocorrect]

Special weapons, alligator tasty #Monsterdon

this dude's RFK JR voice is really getting on my nerves

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon “The alligator is presumed fed” YAY!

Fun Roque Fact: the, uh, photography scene was one of my formative horror memories watching this on TV as a child #monsterdon

Because all mysteries in the 80s are solved by Maverick Cops wandering into sewers, the detective has decided to wander in the sewers looking for a giant alligator and/or his partner's body.

He finds a dead dog being eaten by rats, which is gross, so he takes pictures of it.

#monsterdon

@klu9

It’s a Jaws rip-off, how many scenes could it have?! 10?!

#monsterdon #alligator1980

@Taweret I'm going to assume you mean the reporter about which I wholeheartedly agree. #Monsterdon

Of COURSE it's stuck

#Monsterdon

okay I need that guy to not talk anymore

#monsterdon

"science tells us that this movie isn't possible"

#monsterdon