Dammit. I wanted him to get eaten :/ #Monsterdon

@trixter I would like to see Ricky Stratton be eaten by an alligator.

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Officer Kelly is gator chow... om nom nom.

All in all, you're just another brick in the sewer wall

#Monsterdon

Yeah yeah, you saw some shit in Saint Louie, you're a hardass all right #Monsterdon

"Next time, try Lawrence Welk." Yes. I lived through that reference. OMG. L-Dub. #monsterdon

Does anyone really need a *reason* to leave St. Louis?

#Monsterdon

The gator told me! The gator even said he’d testify for me in court!

#alligator1980 #monsterdon

I frequently keep a shotgun next to my desk while doing paperwork.
#monsterdon

I'm giving @Mallow such a good cultural foundation in life 📽🐊

#Monsterdon

Hey, this movie is from 1980. Why is it channeling that unpleasantly misanthropic "every single person is horrible" vibe that we keep noticing in films from the 70s?

Anyhow I wonder what Ramon is up to
I hope he's having fun

#monsterdon

Star wipe!

#monsterdon #alligator1980

There was nothing more feared in the late 70's than an investigative journalist. #monsterdon

This department has the most extra extras that have ever extra'd

#Monsterdon

no spinning newspaper?

#Monsterdon

Details of municipal sewage system giving very Victor Hugo vibes

#Monsterdon

Just keep staring at Forster's head now....

#Monsterdon

lol, what a fun job fishing body parts out the sewage works is!

#Monsterdon

Hmm, methinks the shifty pet store employee disposing improperly of dead animals by dumping them into the sewer is about to be hoist upon his own pétard.

Get ready for a mammoth frog chomp!

#monsterdon

I missed some "plot". What is this guy doing with a shopping cart full of stuff going to the sewers?
#monsterdon

@allanb

They're in Chicago... the Florida of the Midwest?

#Monsterdon

C'MOOOON CROCODILE

LET'S GET *SHAKIN'* CROC MAN!

DEATH SPIN THIS *ENTIRE GODDAMN CAST* #Monsterdon

Next we go to 1968 (or was it 69?), and we know it was then because a radio news is telling us about Chicago protestors disrupting the democratic national convention.

Anyway, the point is an evil stepdad alligatorknaps the adorable girl's alligator and flushes it down the toilet because he's a monster. We see the alligator floating through sewer tunnels.

#monsterdon

OMG. This is the one where he flushes it and it mutates and grows massive in the sewer.....#monsterdon

@paco Aye! Well done!! I'll go with that. #Monsterdon #Alligator1980

Very few animals make good pets, only the laziest and most needy need apply

#Monsterdon

Great live show for the kids
#monsterdon

lol, that child is never unseeing that....

#Monsterdon

I mean, his species lived through a giant asteroid hitting the earth, right?

#Monsterdon #WrongRamón

@plaidtron3000 #Monsterdon #WrongRamón

Maybe he could kill the alligator with his bad acting.

this is the weakest Latino gang I've ever seen, btw. My math study group coulda beat these guys up.

#Monsterdon #WrongRamón

does this count as a "meet cute"?

#Monsterdon #WrongRamón

@strangefour @starkraving666 Marc Alaimo had a role in Grizzly 2. Also in Dr. Black, Mr. Hyde (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0074430/?ref_=ext_shr_lnk), where the black doctor turns into a „whiteface“ Mr. Hyde 😅 #monsterdon #alligator2

"Let's see how you like it when the shoe's on the other foot, floating in the pond!"

#Monsterdon #WrongAlligator

@gnomon

#monsterdon

@jsadow maybe with Alligator he was trying to write standard schlock to make sure he got a paycheck? It didn't seem like the script was very invested in anything that went on.

#monsterdon

I'ma be shedding crocodile tears for those rich folks.

#Monsterdon #WrongAlligator

Cop: “you wanna see a disembodied leg, little girl?”

#Alligator2TheMutation1991 #monsterdon

@jsadow I had not heard of him before and haven't seen most of his movies, but I see that he also wrote the Howling, which I think was better than this movie and also a year later, so maybe his skills were ramping up?

#monsterdon

@floatybirb John Sayles went on to become (really) one of the best American filmmakers.

#monsterdon

#monsterdon #alligator #alligator1980

@gnomon @Taweret I wonder if there are any actual documentaries that would qualify for monsterdon?

#Monsterdon

Be sure to check out the #WorstMonsterdon hashtag on your way out!

#Monsterdon

RE: https://mastodon.murkworks.net/@RobynGoodfellow/115562949752367453

oh goddammit in some universe there is a version of this film that actually does this and I WANT TO SEE THAT VERSION SO BAD NOW

#monsterdon #alligator1980

@davesdogmaggie @paco Alligators are known to spin around rapidly. #monsterdon

I *knew* that manhole would be blocked.

#Monsterdon

Same manhole-cover/car gag as in "C.H.U.D.".

EDIT: "Alligator" did it first.

#monsterdon #Alligator

Last #monsterdon post today, for any #sbig / #sobaditsgood fans: Alligator 2 has Richard Lynch, Kane Hodder, and Steve Railsback. https://miru.miyaku.media/

@apLundell to be fair what wasn't

#Monsterdon #Alligator1980

GATORBOMB
#monsterdon #alligator1980

One good thing having waited this long to see it? Captions. 😁

#Monsterdon

This gator eats a lot of just legs

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon #Alligator1980 and the cycle... continues

ok that was hilarious

but pretty much the same movie as CHUD :D

#Monsterdon #Alligator1980 ramón jr???!

getting horny over blown up alligator bits? these people are sick #monsterdon

This is tense. #monsterdon

They're exploding all the things

#Monsterdon

well that was well put together monster related fun, shows what having actors in a movie does!

#Monsterdon

@plaidtron3000 oh god can't stand it #monsterdon

And they fucked off into the sewer! The end!

#Monsterdon

It's gently tapping him against the limo. #monsterdon

lol, still with the balding jokes......

#MOnsterdon

I recall seeing an ad for this film when I was young & never got around to watching it. Thanks for voting on it, #Monsterdon

Red flag, lady. Red flags galore!

#Monsterdon

Checkov's bomber, and checkov's methane pocket?

#monsterdon #alligator1980

So is the clock radio going to light the dynamite or

#Monsterdon

@randy_s "sometimes life throws you curve balls" #Monsterdon

Old guy with a walker finally makes his entrance.

#monsterdon

Let's split is RIGHT

#Monsterdon

nice classic sticks of dynamite....

#MOnsterdon

Best Lubriderm commercial ever

#Monsterdon

Some people are waaaaaaaaaay ahead of me. Mine only just jumped the alligator. #monsterdon

Oh no I forgot they did a scream loop in the wedding scene. I HATE THOSE #cannotstophearing #monsterdon

Just let Ramon cook

#Monsterdon

MONSTER CHOMP

Unnamed trooper gets pulled out of the water sans legs! Welp I guess that counts as a small amuse-bouche for Ramon, or possibly a palate cleanser between courses as... yep, cut back to the wedding. Thank you, yes, excellent. Now all we need is a cut back to the bazookas we saw earlier.

C'mon, give the people what they want!

#monsterdon

That’s not how you scream when being bit in two. That was more of a “it burns when I pee” sound.

#Monsterdon

Slate mansion/stately Wayne Manor #Monsterdon

Driver's like, "Hold up, I wanna see where he's going with this." #Monsterdon

Okay you actually have his legs too close to the propellers but sure let's say the alligator did it

#Monsterdon #Alligator1980

MY GOD this guy is still going on his trauma dumping?
#monsterdon #alligator1980

This grilling scene is almost as awkward as the bowling scene from Werewolf of Washington. #Monsterdon

Time to cut bait, boys. #Monsterdon

you know what, never mind, I retract the question

Madison can do whatever he wants as long as he does it off screen while we watch Ramon grabbing snacks on legs

#monsterdon

Did Madison just decide to start using Marisa as a scratching post because he couldn't take out his frustration on his two ex-coworkers who surprised him in the restaurant there..? I'm struggling a little bit to make sense of that last scene. Did I miss something?

#monsterdon

He sure wears a lot of red for someone who just watches other people die all the time - WAIT A MINUTE

#Monsterdon #Alligator1980

I think the Chief is ready to explode.....

"SERENITY NOW!" dude

#Monsterdon

He was eaten whole in front of us.
We would imagine there would be not much of him left

#monsterdon

White people eating with chopsticks and nobody makes a big deal about it? 1980 cinema really was more 70s than 80s wasn't it. #monsterdon

@JoeWynne wait this is set in Chicago?

#Monsterdon #Alligator1980

MONSTER CHOMP

*Ramon inhales Brock more or less whole*

#monsterdon

This is the most amazing #Alligator. It's like 40 feet long, but it can move all over the city without anyone seeing it. Like some kind of ninja gator. Oooh, do I smell a sequel?
#monsterdon

@fabio I was wondering that too and my best guess is that it climbed in over the fence when we weren't looking and just sat there chilling for a while, waiting for a child to fall into its mouth. #monsterdon

Did they break up because he was momentarily stand-offish?

#Monsterdon

So much trash everywhere, does this city have no self respect? Is there a strike?

Well there goes the Big Game Hunter! lol!

#Monsterdon

"It's vision is based on sobriety. I'll be safe if I dull my reaction times by chugging from this flask"

#Monsterdon

Mm, Silva Snax #Monsterdon

"There's a heavy penalty in this life for fear." This movie has some gems. #monsterdon

Clever Girl in five... four... three... #Monsterdon

Heh. There's a kid doing crocodile shadows on the other end of the street :P #Monsterdon

Detective Sweater Jacket and Reptile Science Master are on a date and have awkward romantic dialog to make the audience groan. After they do an off-screen sex, Detective Sweater Jacket talks about how his partner died to prove how noir his backstory is.

Reptile Science Master tries to make him feel better because it wasn't his fault, but then he gets cranky because she's playing with his hair and he's going bald I guess.

#monsterdon