"we need a script for this scene"
"got it." *opens the encyclopedia for wolf*

#monsterdon

After more investigation we are now suspecting hot shapeshifters, so Different Headband watches Original Headband go to beach, take off his clothes, draw some paw prints on the ground, then lap a puddle and go howl at the moon. But then Original Headband spots Different Headband and challenges him to a naked wrestling match.

#monsterdon

I just want him to be like "No I was just fuckin' with you man, what the hell"

#Monsterdon #Wolfen1981

Oh no the author's thinly disguised fetish #Monsterdon

That's some serious frolicking music.

#monsterdon

Oh yeah, werewolf transformation time. Let's see that special effects budget! #Monsterdon

@cd0 There is no spoon.

#monsterdon

oh my god is this movie going to REALLY commit to the racism now. fucking hell

#monsterdon

Which werewolf murder investigator are you? #monsterdon

It could be a corgi. #monsterdon

@wohali #monsterdon

who's "WE"? I'ma go raid the kitchen.

What are you, double-parked or something?

screenshot

#monsterdon

"Survival of the shiftiest"

Hrm...

#Monsterdon #Wolfen1981

This is the most naked corpses with convenient object censorship I have seen in a movie.

#monsterdon

♫ People ♪

♫ Who eat peeeeeople ♪

♫ Are the haaaaappiest people ♪

#Monsterdon

@wohali wtf! #monsterdon

this movie is made unimaginably worse by the introduction of this guy and everything he says #monsterdon

@nev You mean like the baristas in Friends who had a loft in the Village? 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ #Monsterdon 🐺 #Wolfen

In the 80s one point of contact was enough apparently?
#monsterdon

they put a weird amount of effort into this movie considering nothing happens in it

#monsterdon

@LingLass Cheese! Wolfs will self domesticate for cheese! #iDontMakeTheRules #monsterdon

Is that worker with the shoulder-length hair and aluminum helmet even credible?

I don't think so.

#Monsterdon

OMG
It just keeps getting worse.
#monsterdon

Red on the out-- jesus christ fuck this cop

#Monsterdon

"Wolves are like Indians. Except for the ways they aren't remotely the same; in those respects native Americans are more like Werewolves.

Or another way of looking at it is that they are nothing at all like non-human animals."

#Monsterdon #Wolfen #Wolfen1981

hell yea eccentric biologist with taxidermy pets let's GO

#Monsterdon

Hell yes let's meet the wolv--

Nope, it's just Chuck Testa.

#Monsterdon

Natalie goes back to her ridiculously fancy flat. She thinks she hears a monster so she grabs her gun. She doesn't find a monster but does find a cat to hug.

#monsterdon

Things the monster sounds like in this movie:

wind chimes
a baby
a photon torpedo
unexplained creaking

#monsterdon

it would be funny (and honestly quite possible) if they actually filmed those parts of the movie with an IR lens/lack of filter. like if they went through that trouble for accuracy but it just looks flat and confusing

#monsterdon

@ottaross

Bridge and tunnel crowd are the WORST

#Monsterdon #Wolfen1981

I'm starting to think this wolf is smart enough to pretend to be a cute stray doggie and get to amble freely around the streets of New York

#Monsterdon #Wolfen1981

it shouldn't be allowed for supernatural wolves to not have some weakness like "only active during a full moon" because they become OP and ruin the meta. no society can survive even a single invulnerable devil wolf #monsterdon

Kitty!

#Monsterdon #Wolfen1981

🐺 5
🤷‍♂ 0

#Monsterdon

[WOLF KILLING NOISES]: "pew pew"

#monsterdon

Someone please stop playing the theme to Are You Being Served in the background?
#monsterdon

Man instagram filters used to look really dumb.
#monsterdon

I wonder what Edward James Olmos is doing.

#monsterdon

POSTERIZE THEM! HAHAHA WE'VE MADE YOUR HISTOGRAM ALL SPIKY!!!!
MU HAHAHAHA
#monsterdon

glowy eyes!

#Monsterdon #Wolfen1981

From James Tolkan's perspective, Back to the Future is four years in his future.

But that's all in the past.
#monsterdon

"Must've been the wind" npc guard-ass line

#Monsterdon

Well, it looks like some kinda Silent Hill boss fight happened here

#Monsterdon

Different Headband and the Lady Cop (I think she's a cop anyway, but maybe she's something different, like a psychiatrist) go wander the urban desolation and find a church. A monster is looking at the with its poster vision.

They wander inside the church because they hear a weird sound that sounds like a baby.

#monsterdon

Yes James Tolkan was also the principal in Back to the Future.
#monsterdon

Oh no. Stop film. Stop killing Black people. #Monsterdon

@ricci

:D

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Tolkan

#Monsterdon #Wolfen1981

You must leave the bronx!
#monsterdon

STRICKLAND

#monsterdon

OH yeah, the guy who was the base commander in Top Gun

#monsterdon

Ooh, I want this office.

#monsterdon

@paco

THAT'S the motive!

#Monsterdon #Wolfen1981

maybe it's uhhhhh some sort of creature released by the demolition. or a gas leak

#monsterdon

WERE-HOUSING-CRISIS

#monsterdon

There's an 80s office just like this in the smithsonian.
#monsterdon

these screen effects and the light gore would be killer fun at a drive-in
#monsterdon #wolfen1981

Unintentionally hilarious scene

#Monsterdon

I'm bored gimme wolf

#monsterdon

Additional characters in this #Monsterdon

lady cop with a special interest in gruesome murders who likes to tell the men about the severed genitals.

cranky police boss stock character

urban explorer who gets eaten by a monster (RIP)

just cut together all the wolf vision scenes and call it a day, i don't need the rest of this shit #monsterdon

Wolfy that guy is NOT USDA prime :/ #Monsterdon

Computers using the same text font as they use on the numbers on your banking checks. Because, computer.

#monsterdon

“We take you from 80s NYC to the bombed out streets of 1946 Generic European City”

Not really, but wow this looks like a WWII city set #Monsterdon

I like living in urban decay. Honestly these scenes of wherever-in-NYC (probably the Bronx) look like fun.

#monsterdon

was that a meow

#monsterdon

An Elder Sign! #Monsterdon

Is it just the era, or is this whole movie marinated in world-is-fucked vibes?

#Monsterdon

The technology's probably exactly what he said.

Except it doesn't tell you shit about whether someone is lying or not.

#monsterdon

Okay I guess the control center is just The Cops but still it's cool as hell

#Monsterdon

@paco I'm watching on a laptop w/ bluetooth headphones, but I think it might be your sound-setup

#monsterdon

"The cock and balls? They stuff them in the victim's mouth."

And the true New Yorker just keeps eating his hot dog.

#Monsterdon

Pictured: one of those "Law Enforcement Fusion Centers" that your municipality is spending billions of dollars on, only in the 1980s.

#monsterdon

They liked your violence report. They especially liked all the violence.
#monsterdon

wait this is a werewolf movie. isn't the protagonist supposed to be confronting their sexual desires but like as a metaphor?

#monsterdon

I love how, in the 80s, the sound effect would be for a ·printer· when computer text rendered on a ·screen·… 😛

#monsterdon

Some of these sound effect sound stolen from 2001: A Space Odyssey. From the pod.
#monsterdon

Having clicked on all the clues in the "Park" area, we advance to the "Morgue" area to look at naked corpses and eat cookies.

Afro-Goatee-Man then explains to the audience that there is no metal in the dead bodies so the dead bodies were not decapitated by a sword, golf club or other metal implement.

After this clue, Different Headband goes to the chalkboard room to tell his boss which ethnic groups to suspect in the brain theft.

#monsterdon

"Phillipinos remove organs with their hands" and the Italians can kick a skeleton clean out of your body while the Irish... #Monsterdon

🦖#MONSTERDON 🎞️

⁉️ WOLFISH TRIVIA 🐺🩸

Die Hard fans!
👀 Look for Reginald VelJohson (Al Powell in Die Hard) as the morgue attendant who slaps the dead man on the gurney.

#Monsterdon #Wolfen1981

ALL PSYCOS is the WiFi password.

#Monsterdon #Wolfen

Good dog!

#Monsterdon

I wonder what the werewolves are up to

#monsterdon

I wonder if it's safe to eat an apple 🍎 during the upcoming morgue scene? #Monsterdon 🐺 #Wolfen

So... there's... some... gore.
#monsterdon

Always. Always someone snacking in the morgue. #monsterdon #Wolfen

Dude building birdhouses in the morgue? #Monsterdon

I love a sassy morgue

#Monsterdon

Huh, didn't know Gregory Hines did non-dancing roles. Young kamikat was obsessed with both The Cotton Club and White Nights
#monsterdon

This movie's got class. And tell the corpse to stop smiling. #Monsterdon

#monsterdon lol Hollywood is so horny for a weird coroner

Has there EVER been a normal, professional coroner on screen

#monsterdon Seriously if this lady's last name was Wayne ISTFG

"Hey careful with her" /thump "oh shit!" "...head" okay that was chuckleworthy

#Monsterdon 🐺 #Wolfen it ate his braaaaaains? 🤣🤣🤣

Nobody ever thinks about the head! 😆

#Monsterdon

I’m Alberty Finney and no one in this town does beleaguered better than me. #Monsterdon

"I've got a hand in a baggie"

don't we all

#Monsterdon

Was this scene all ADR?
#Monsterdon

Hee hee, see if you can sniff out anything, like a wolf

#Monsterdon

Do you think fireflies ever look at helicopters and think... what the HELL

#Monsterdon

I forgot what this guy's name is so I'm going to call him "different headband" to contrast him with the other headband guy.

#monsterdon