Shoot, I’m an idiot; I thought Dunwich was the fishpeople story.
#Monsterdon

Nothing better fucking happen to Rusty... #monsterdon

I think you'll need a bigger gun if that's Wilbur's brother

#Monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror1970

yeah the hand thing looks more silly than creepy or whatever its supposed to be

#Monsterdon

Fire
Tentacles
Fire
Tentacles

The end is nigh!

#monsterdon

FISH HEADS!

FISH HEADS!

FLAMING FIREY FISH HEADS!

#monsterdon

so yog soggoth is a cat. just likes knocking shit off tables. it's a cat.

#monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror1970

@trixter They wanted him to twirl a switchblade there, but Dead kept cutting himself so they just handed him a bowie knife instead.
#Monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror

Pornstache was never instructed in cutlery beyond the knife.

#monsterdon

Now I want to make a NES emulator running on cursed hardware*** called NecroFamicon #Monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror1970
***Zune 4GB

#monsterdon Much like "The Man With Two Brains", she has a screw-top skull for convenience sakes.

It's his big summoning, you'd think he could dress up a bit for it. Maybe something like this:

#monsterdon

#monsterdon “LANDSHARK!”

Because our library cop was stabbed, the vineyard is dying. The Land and King are one.

#monsterdon

I feel like the Cenobites are probably busting through the wall in the next room over

#Monsterdon

Oh great, the neighbors think were watching more porn.

#Monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror1970

WELP so much for meddling girl pulling the rubber mask off Wilbur's brother.

DISCO is the force between dimensions.

His earlier ranting that small-town folks are petty fools who hate anyone of different religions, seems 100% accurate.

AND NOW, the library scene! Which in the story is thrilling, & here the priceless, horrific Necronomicon is guarded by a simple poorly-locked case, & a rent-a-cop.

#monsterdon #DunwichHorror

If the prof was giving his last lecture in a few days, then this should be right around finals.

Which could account for the creeping dread of inevitable calamity, but Nancy should be sweating bullets.
#Monsterdon

Accidental spearing, that's manslaughter all right #Monsterdon

The townfolk discover we are doing a secret cult funeral in their graveyard and appear to crash it and knock things over because it is Not Christian. Which is very on brand for small US towns.

#monsterdon

@Louisa they could have re-used the one from the opening credits even

#Monsterdon

If I were Cthulhu I'd instigate a lot of strife just to chuckle at the scrappy, flailing way that grown men fight

#Monsterdon

That security guard is no match for a student of the occult!

#monsterdon

Items needed for a Secret Tentacle Monster Cult Funeral

tarot cards
mortar and pestle
very large knife (to slice the dirt)
coffin with dead guy and rafters above it
chanting about darkness

#monsterdon

SANDRA DEE: is in the movie

#Monsterdon

Bingo!

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonBingo #TheDunwichHorror1970

Ok, I kinda like the townspeople at the moment

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon Vaseline on the camera is hard to clean off.

The difference is: Dean doesn't CARE if he destroys Sandra Dee, old dude #Monsterdon 🦑 #TheDunwichHorror1970

Rolled a critical failure and failed the saving throw ​:ms_d20:​

#Monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror1970

After the LSD sex ritual, the Secret Upstairs Door grandfather mentioned before rustles itself. Then Elizabeth goes to visit a barn and ignores a very cool owl. Grandfather tries to get her to go away so she punches an old man and starts wandering in the mansion, which has the tennis racket pattern on its floor. Grandfather recovers from being punched and hobbles after her as she wanders the halls shouting "Nancy, where are you!?"

#monsterdon

Well, that didn't help Nancy
#Monsterdon

The tentacles teleported her clothing off? Damn, this IS a Corman flick huh. #Monsterdon

Grandpa seems remarkably unconcerned about Elizabeth going up the forbidden staircase

#Monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror1970

Because Wilbur has explained how the sex temple used to work, Nancy has a vision of some robed people doing a sex ritual with shockingly little nudity and then Wilbur is there and she's the target of the sex ritual and we see that Wilbur has hieroglyphic looking tattoos on his chest.

#monsterdon

Old Man: "Remember when the Elder Gods walked the Earth? Pepperridge Farm remembers."

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon House is quite nice

Still not as icky as when old Dean Stockwell Cylon hooked up with a much younger Cylon in BSG

#Monsterdon

Don't mind my pet owl. #monsterdon

This is the LEAST erotic, erotic scene I’ve ever seen.

#Monsterdon

That door's excited. #monsterdon

@brooke Yeah sounds a bit like Coastal Divorce #monsterdon

"No, no, no... Sandra, it's gonna be artsy! Like you're getting defiled on a pair of corduroy pants!"

#Monsterdon

Anyway, Wilbur takes Nancy to the swamp and he they find an abandoned temple with an altar. Nancy asks "what was this temple for" and Wilbur explains that it was for fucking and also they should have sex, right now.

#monsterdon

OMFG, I just noticed that horrible cravat. So much horror in this movie. #monsterdon

queue the porn music
but no, we just get this one tune over and over

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon We come, bearing Gold, Frankensense, but wait... there's Myrrh!

I also like how there's an ancient secret ruined temple just out in the woods. It's a very JRPG like vibe where you wander outside of town and find a strange ancient dungeon ruin.

#monsterdon

Oh no now he’s putting the moves on her
Nancy don’t, you have no idea where he’s been
#Monsterdon

and lo, it has come to pass thank you @LuciaG !

#Monsterdon 👶 🧑‍🔬 🧑‍🔬🤰👹🫨🏃😱

the, uh

four

wise guys

#monsterdon

How come people “relish” things, why not mustard or ketchup?

#Monsterdon #TheDunwitchHorror1970

🧿 ring?

#Monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror1970

THE POWER OF DARKNESS COMPELS YOU!

#monsterdon

@trixter Hey look we didn't come here to make good decisions

#Monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror1970

#monsterdon Where the Puritans landed. Right on top of the One Ones themselves. That's why they were so god-fearing.

RE: https://social.tchncs.de/@Blort/117227210485777673

only if the audience is lucky! #Monsterdon 🦑 #TheDunwichHorror1970

If she's feeling dizzy, don't insist she walk, Romeo. #monsterdon

Nice weekend by the seaside, he said.

#Monsterdon #TheDunwitchHorror1970

Wilbur is a walking, talking, non-euclidian migraine relief advert

#Monsterdon

She's about 90% LSD by volume now. #Monsterdon

Old Man Yells at Cthulu

#monsterdon

Livinia got alien'd, I guess

#Monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror1970

Wilbur you beast

#Monsterdon

back in the sepiatone days

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon 🦑 #TheDunwichHorror1970 Did they use an ENTIRE can of talc on Lloyd Bochner's hair?

fellas, should it be a crime to believe in a species of elder space gods that will one day return to rule the world?

#monsterdon

Dream job: being that receptionist. Just make sure the local folk get to see the doctor on time. No rushing. Make coffee on the reg.

#monsterdon

#monsterdon

"And they will brought back, there is going to be an election in US and-"

I'm expecting Bruce Campbell to burst in with a chainsaw any minute now... aaaaaannnny minute...

#Monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror1970

RE: https://wandering.shop/@Violinknitter/117227185899182272

'cos you ain't Sandra Dee

(luckily for YOUR character)

#Monsterdon 🦑 #TheDunwichHorror1970

ugh the mustaches
#Monsterdon

Fun fact: Section 102.3.32(b) of HIPAA allows your medical records to be turned over if there is a Lovecraftian situation
#monsterdon

Dunwich Medical Fraud.

#monsterdon

There's

some

THING

in the guest room

#Monsterdon

This was before the HIPPA rules.

#Monsterdon
#TheDunwichHorror1970

#Monsterdon 👶 🧑‍🔬 🧑‍🔬🤰👹🫨🏃😱

"I'm Henry Armitage, Doctorate in Philosophy" <-- how all of us should identify ourselves

Professor Armitage and Nancy's friend appear at the swanky knicknack mansion where the grandfather character stares at her and Nancy reassures them that she's staying with Wilbur in the suspicious mansion. Inside, Nancy is tired and disoriented and Wilbur continues with his unsettling subtly controlling behavior. Grandfather is mad at Wilbur for bringing the girl here and now the Professor, who knows dark secrets about Grandfather's father because he wrote a paper on him.

#monsterdon

how long has Doc Cory been working?

#monsterdon

I have to read the book, grandfather!

I'm only one book away from a free pizza!

#Monsterdon

"I do what I want!"

Pornstache channeling his inner Cartman

#monsterdon

The real horror here is the 1970s. #monsterdon

That was too easy, good night!
Kidding! :blobcatgiggle2: I want to see the end of it!
#monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror

#monsterdon Tea! not coffee! That's why you displease the Necronomnomnomicon. It doesn't even want your amuse bouche... Nancy. Tea... tsk…

We cut to the brunette character who is doing a car search for Nancy; she is suspicious that she ran off with the mustache guy.

Meanwhile Nancy is explaining her dream to Wilbur who tries to use dream analysis to get into her pants.

#monsterdon

lol, Nancy giving 'Natalie Harp' vibes...

#Monsterdon

"...blink twice if you've been hypnotized"

#Monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror

Is it Halloween or did people just have punkins on their porch any old time back in the day?

#Monsterdon

Just channel your inner Mel Brooks. That's scary, right

#Monsterdon

"Is my girlfriend here or isn't she?"

hm

#Monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror1970

"If he was a straight guy, I wouldn't be worried"

What

#Monsterdon

oh great, now I'm going to be up all night convinced there's a hippie commune under the bed

#monsterdon

#monsterdon This is exceptionally Jodorowski.

A sequence that Lovecraft would call "Pandæmonic", probably.

#Monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror1970

Anyway, because the tiny car was sabotaged, Nancy has to stay over so Wilbur shows her to what I must assume is the Purple Curtained Bedroom of Monster Birthing.

#monsterdon

@klu9 Then it must be that

#Monsterdon

"We have poured all of our genius into making the theme song for this movie slap, thus we must use it every five minutes! It will alternate with the surprise theremin and then we shall have a soundtrack!"

#monsterdon

#TeamWhateverIsBehindTheDoor

#Monsterdon #TheDunwichHorror1970

okay, conveniently having a nightgown is a BIT MUCH

run, lady

runnnnn

#monsterdon

"Sorry about this room, please ignore all the peep holes I've drilled into it...."

Lady, lock that door.

#Monsterdon