@SordidAmok "the vegimen enjoy their servitude!"

Ok joanne...

#monsterdon

Whew, that took a little effort to get to a conclusion.

I'm not sure what was harder - filming it or watching it.

#monsterdon

I am now Kasting Highlander II: The Quickening as a palate cleanser #monsterdon

#monsterdon Those two idiots really make me root for the aliens

I'm trying to work out which of Prof. Tanga and Dr. Puna have tenure in this scenario. The rank seems a bit uncertain.

#monsterdon

The mere fact we are watching this is an insult to us, and that is the funniest part

#monsterdon

I'm not sure I can make it through this, y'all

#monsterdon

Because our party is clearly doomed, we need reinforcements, and so helpfully encounter a polycule of Native American Village People on horseback; amazingly they look more like stereotypical southwest indians than the expected stereotypical plains indians but manage to be simultaneously almost hot and extremely embarrassing.

#monsterdon #invasionofthestarcreatures

That reaction shot from the secretary was meme-worthy

You could hotbox that helmet and miss the rest of the movie.....

#monsterdon

break out the Oscar for the receptionist

#monsterdon

SPACE PALS TO THE END

#Monsterdon

In the ensuing battle, the scarecrow guys demonstrate their superior strength by lifting paper mache rocks and breaking logs, which one main characters counters by defeating physics and levitating himself in the air to catch a branch, and the other counters by rolling in the grass and then begging.

Fortunately, we here an Unbidden Whirling Noise, which is the sound of Telepathy as the scarecrow guys are recalled to the cave.

#monsterdon #invasionofthestarcreatures

Okay, so a remake, but it's just the giant women and the Vegemen hanging out on whatever planet they're from. Did they say the name of their planet?

#monsterdon

@lytta very niche reference for a halloween party costume #monsterdon

This scene needs a Gorn.

#Monsterdon #InvasionOfTheStarCreatures #🌟

Captured by the space dames with the uncomfortable looking utility belts, the boys decide to escape with the power of seduction, which involves talking in French and being uncomfortable. The girl is confused by this because they don't have horniness on their planet yet.

Eventually this plan works and one of them kisses the girl, which makes a very electrical kissing noise puts her into... well... I'm gonna say a "standing faint".

#monsterdon #invasionofthestarcreatures

Not that Sinatra… NANCY SINATRA

#monsterdon #invasionofthestarcreatures

Hahahaa... Vegimen awkwardly tossing an already broken table. This is like a high school production.👌 #monsterdon

Lol, these space ladies are pretty spot on about our doomed culture, I'll give them that

#monsterdon

"The Vegimen"

OK, that's pretty fun

#monsterdon

I really hope these ladies kick the shit out of those dudes.

#monsterdon

the use of CAT to describe the big-lipped ET is so 1960s. they also just used JAZZ and YOU DIG. big linguistic faux pas if they’re supposed to be setting the movie 10 years earlier.

yes, am the life of the nerd party.

#monsterdon
#InvasionOfTheStarCreatures

As I understand 20th Century, those two characters just had sex

#monsterdon #Smoking

INDIGENOUS rock? Oh boy, here we go with this now

#Monsterdon

this wurlitzer music is not helping. i did chuckle with the decanting of the wine.

#monsterdon
#InvasionOfTheStarCreatures

@davesdogmaggie post-COVID, poorly wearing a mask hits a bit different

#monsterdon #InvasionOfTheStarCreatures

Timing. Comedy is all about timing.

#monsterdon

There is a line of soldiers in the room, whom the main goofs join, that the colonel is terrorizing with a sword, a gun, and a grenade; the former because the colonel likes swords and the later two because this is America and some things never change.

We learn our mission; there was a mysterious explosion and it left a crater, and there's a cave in the crater and the army dudes have to investigate it because this is the cold war and atomic space nuclear.

#monsterdon #invasionofthestarcreatures

Now we get to see some of that lovely California countryside before it went up in flames

*Laughs the damned laugh of 2025

#monsterdon

#monsterdon We are thirteen minutes into this film and we're still being subjected to this "idiotic army officer briefs a room full of idiots" scene, this does not bode well for my mental health

(this was a perfect choice for the evening, well done everyone)

Would 1962 people have been laughing at this? I think no.

#monsterdon

I'm not sure I can do this.

#monsterdon

Oh crap. It's a comedy.

#monsterdon

If there's one thing that ages like milk, it's comedy. I can't wait for those 1962 pop culture references we will not get at all.

#monsterdon

@TerryHancock @ohiofi I had to capture it. It was a fabulous line. #monsterdon

I think this was the high point of the film. When some actress managed to pull off this line smoothly with a straight face. It was the most talent visible in a single scene. #monsterdon

https://infosec.exchange/@paco/113937576974181897

@floatybirb @RufusJCooter honestly thought it was just random electricity

the idea that they're giving the army guys cancer makes me feel a little better

#monsterdon

@MCDuncanLab @SordidAmok those poor Vegimen, just pawns in all this... #monsterdon

A reminder, we could have actually GOOD riff-worthy films.

#monsterdon

@miriamrobern If I ever get a time machine I promise to go back to the day after the robbery and take a dose of Narcan. #monsterdon

I think I only managed a chuckle, a chortle, and a smirk out of that comedy feature.

Not a gem in the pantheon of the comedy-film genre.

#monsterdon

I did like the giant women and the Vegemen. Everything else about it was horrible.

#monsterdon

Imagine if the giant women from space had taken over Earth, killed all the men and started an all women society with Vegemen slaves. That would be a movie.

Oh, but the Vegemen like being slaves. Like the slaves in the Harry Potter books. Okay. Wait. Forget I said that.

#monsterdon

Dolores Reed, who played Dr Tanga:

In 1960, she married Boyce Leon Mosco, a salesman and heroin addict, who once was convicted of armed robbery. Falling on hard times three years later, he, Dolores and others tried to rob an armored truck but failed and managed to flee. A frightened Dolores hid out at home where she died of a heroin overdose the following day.

#monsterdon

now

never let us speak of this again

#InvasionOfTheStarCreatures #monsterdon

I really hope the rest of the fleet arrives like Three Body Problem* and wipes them all out.

*no spoilers

#monsterdon

#monsterdon It's idly, foolishly racist. Which is just what racism is. So. FINE.

We then learn that marriage is like slavery, and then the space dames are carrying all the dumb boxes the main characters were carrying into the cave, out of the cave, asserting the triumph of patriarchal values and norms after those mores were threatened by dommy space dames, presumably making the audience uncomfortable.

#monsterdon #invasionofthestarcreatures

"you will learn to love your oppression ladies, it's the Earth way"

#monsterdon

holy Christ in heaven help us

#monsterdon

Crap. They're not going to kill Philbluck and Pimm.

#monsterdon

The bar for comedic excellence in this film is a sound board and two actors poking at levers and dials on a static set, apparently. At least we got through that inexcusable prior scene.

But where are our carrot monster heros?!

#monsterdon

Okay, so after farting around the campfire causing multiple human resources complaints, everyone gets drunk and passes out, then the main characters wake up and go after the space dames; unfortunately neither the colonel nor the american indian stereotypes accompany them.

However, their support is not needed, because the space dames have left their cave-mounted rocketship unguarded.

#monsterdon #invasionofthestarcreatures

#monsterdon It's every foley sound they had left. All at once. FINE? :)

Bad foley artist. Bad bad bad. Must be punished #monsterdon

#monsterdon This movie is unconsciously queer. In that, I have some respect.

I can't wait for this one to go into the dustbin of history.

#monsterdon

I'm building a time machine just so I can travel to the 60s and beat this guy with a baseball bat

#monsterdon

Okay, so the leader of the polycule also has a space cereal ring, and so is automatically recruited into our doomed expedition. Because this movie was made before the American Indian Movement taught the white man the meaning of shame, we get a peace pipe ceremony, pass around a jug of moonshine and then do a dance for no reason.

Props to the hottest indian stereotype for not smoking but doing an extremely silly dance.

#monsterdon #invasionofthestarcreatures

#monsterdon The alien language sounds like someone trying to clear a drain.

The women's outfits and general portrayal don't seem so offensive now, do they?

#monsterdon

Oh fuck, with all the hideous racism I almost forgot the main plot about the Giantesses....

#monsterdon

Oh! This must be the offensive part.

#monsterdon

ahh okay back to the racism now

#Monsterdon

So the scarecrow guys are going back because the space babes are about to take off in their spaceship, which the main characters decide to tattle on to the colonel. Naturally, he thinks they're idiots, but he convinces them by swearing on his Space Commander Connor's Secret Ring, which I guess comes from a cereal box and automatically enrolls you into a nerd frat with a designated pecking order.

#monsterdon #invasionofthestarcreatures

The space pal salute is incredible. This is a good bit, I like this bit.

#Monsterdon

gotta say, the music for this fight scene is not the right tempo for a fight scene.

Feels more avant garde

#monsterdon

Okay so the other dame realizes that the first dame is paralyzed by Love (speaking in french and doing a very noisy kiss), and that the puny earthlings have escaped. They send their scarecrow guys in pursuit, who roll some rocks at the escaping humans in a scene that needs both a coyote and a gorn.

#monsterdon #invasionofthestarcreatures

#monsterdon When I get in the credits someday, I definitely want (Wow!) after my name

How is still 30 minutes left?
#monsterdon

Having escaped from the space dames, we decide to light a cigarette in the cave because this is the 1960s, and then realize that we can use the flickering light to determine where the wind is, which we use to escape the cave. We get the gag again where they run six times over the same cave set in different directions, which is I think another riff on the Extensive Sets available to most #monsterdon movies.

#invasionofthestarcreatures

This would be unwatchable if not for our beloved carrot monsters.

#monsterdon

"What a female wrestler you'd make"
Hmmm, got any aztec mummies handy? We could get a sequel going.

#monsterdon

The girls decide to show us their alien powers to terrify the dumb guys, so they use their cool horn guns on their scarecrow servants... which, when fired, causes them to dance a little bit and then disappear.

I'm thinking, "Maybe you shouldn't shoot those at your own goons?" but then again I am not an expert space invasion strategist.

#monsterdon #invasionofthestarcreatures

2 or 3 hundred years? Lady, we're going to destroy our world a lot sooner than that.

#monsterdon

those shoulder darts on the creaturettes cut out blouses are the real MVPs, doing all the work in this movie.

#monsterdon
#InvasionOfTheStarCreatures

Baby? She's a professor and the other one is a doctor, you pig.

#monsterdon

Finally, bullet bras.

#monsterdon

Are these off-brand Devil Girls From Mars? Or knock-off Cat Women Of The Moon? #monsterdon #invasionofthestarcreatures

Tragedy - comedy = ?Time? #invasionofthestarcreatures #monsterdon

Okay, so we find the cave, and the normal soldiers go inside, but the fuckups we've been following for the whole movie stay outside; their job was to carry the comically rectangular brackets with them, which I guess contained a picnic blanket and a turkey, which they eat.

Inside, we learn the guy with student loans is a geologist, and we run into a circle being excited by caves. Then we find a radioactive scarecrow from space, an excellent find.

#monsterdon #invasionofthestarcreatures

The set decoration of this cave! It's just a bunch of canvas tarps draped over a sound stage! Magnificent

#monsterdon

Take a drink every time a “joke” fails #monsterdon #invasionofthestarcreatures

Please send these guys to Vietnam.

#monsterdon

This has a proto-monty-python feel to it. LIke the Monty Python guys took the approach and added actual comedy to it for the win.

#monsterdon

"What's wrong with killing a snake"

HOW LONG DO YOU HAVE, PAL, IT'S A SURPRISINGLY LONG LIST

#Monsterdon

We're like 9 minutes in and not one bullet bra.

#monsterdon

Oh god, this is bad in a whole other way #monsterdon terdon (wtf autocorrect)

Okay so the intro movie to this #monsterdon is a 1960s windows screensaver with words. I do enjoy the scifi videos with the stars going by, just because its classy I guess. We then cut to an army missile base where a narrator guy gloats about all the hydrogen bombs we have. We then get some bumbling soldiers who are having a water hose fight.

After both of them lose, they have a conversation to convince us that they are Dullards and also Clowns. #InvasionOfTheStarCreatures

#monsterdon People don't behave that way, Howdy Doody time? He's not dizzy, he's just a schmuck.

*bracing to find out what all the content warnings are gonna turn out to be about*

#Monsterdon

If you're reading this, you're at the tail end of a long stream of posts on the feed about #Monsterdon, a fediverse community movie-watching event. This week we watched INVASION OF THE STAR CREATURES (1962). See the post at the top of this thread for more info:

https://hachyderm.io/@SnoopJ/111004128276431553

well, that #monsterdon movie sure was ...somethin! lol

@kopio You should probably know that this movie falls far short of the expectations we had based on the title, and in fact is probably the worst thing we've ever seen for #Monsterdon (not in an entertaining way)

I would like to apologize for voting for #invasionofthestarcreatures on #monsterdon not knowing anything about the movie and not even watching it.

@kopio Just read the posts. Skip the movie. #Monsterdon

@floatybirb @Lazarou They thought about it, but then they tried nothing, and they were fresh out of ideas.

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon oh how I miss you alien curtain vixen!

@Bluedepth So far, I think the Wicker Man has been my favorite movie of all the #Monsterdon movies.

Today's Life Lesson from #monsterdon

VOTE in EVERY Election!