Megalon, megalomaniac... no wonder the monster has a rocket dick on its forhead
WAIT!
Isla de Pascua is not uninhabited.
Is there any normal transport in this movie? #monsterdon
OMG all the water is gone... this movie is also about water wars?
We are being taught a weird geology lesson here
it's a Guillermo del Toro 9th rings of kaiju hell opening... or the flaming anus of monster. eithr way, it's creepy.
the Japanese title looks like confetti coming out of the explotions, LOL
I donβt always dress for #monsterdon but when I do, this is what I wear.
#monsterdon OK first of all, gasoline explosions do not look at all like nuclear explosions,,,
@ramsey like all Libertarians, they ran out of money and skulked back to their parents #monsterdon
@RamenCatholic I'll take it! #monsterdon
and that makes the alien merpeople get reinforcement kaiju to gain the 2-1 edge but then cookie monster godzilla shows up and the four of 'em fuck around for a while before Big G gets done with their shit and beats the crap out of 'em and the alien merpeople say "fuck the surface, we out" and nothing gets resolved but the budget?
tar czvf jet-jaguar.tar.gz big-jet-jaguar/
This is the ideal family structure. You may not like it but this is what peak performance looks like. #monsterdon
OK, so that was that
#Monsterdon i strongly believe that no one who contributed to the soundtrack knew that they were recording a soundtrack
@forward this works for everything from Warfare to Petcare! #monsterdon
Jet Jaguar: βThank you, brother.β
Godzilla: βGlad to be of service. Take care now.β #monsterdon
sentient Jet Jaguar would make a great The Nanny
#monsterdon OK I really thought Jet Jaguar and Godzilla were about to either hug or make out, I did not expect a handshake there
LMAO so my question with this scene has always been: is it a fart that's propelling Godzilla like that on his tail? can't be his tail muscles, right?
#monsterdon Godzilla picked the wrong week to quit Amphetamines.
#monsterdon 60βs lounge music is struggling to break through the sonic importance of the Kaiju fight.
The circle of flame will almost certainly burn all the oxygen in it, just like with Octaman
Now we have a buddy movie #monsterdon
Robot shaking Gojira's hand
What next
#monsterdon
Godzilla knows kung fu.
Gojira taking his sweet ass time to save Jet Jaguar cuz he couldn't do it before his morning constitutional at-sea.
@Taweret@octodon.social Oh, this is written by those techbros who talk up hard takeoff singularities!
hahah he programmed himself somehow to increase his own size
#monsterdon Did I miss a scene where they explained why Jet Jaguar can grow to kaiju size? Is this some kind of Honey I Shrunk the Kids fanfic crossover? Is Gigan _actually_ in this or was that just a weird cameo scene?
edit: "Jet Jaguar decided he had to fight Megalon until Godzilla arrives. His determination made him grow to that size."
OK well I'm glad we cleared that up
Ah the 'See who gets dizzy first' fighting tactic
#monsterdon
Avert your eyes, Megalon and Jet Jaguar are kissing.
βToday our little Jet Jaguar is all grown up.β #monsterdon
Jet Jaguar's heart grew eleven sizes that day #monsterdon
Finally those stupid drill hands have use, somewhat contrived as it is
@diazona @allanb they'd be paste, meaty jam #monsterdon
Now squished by a rock but probably not dead
#monsterdon
These beautiful building models did not get a lot of face-time before they were destroyed
@lorgonumputz I miss those bug eye helicopters #monsterdon
Godzilla is like: I understand dude
What language is the robot and the giant monster using to communicate and why hasn't Humanity ever done any of this before?
Is this the Singularity?
If so....cool!
I don't think something that big should hop around like that
okay megalon's kangaroo hops are hilarious
#monsterdon Heβs got special Flava Flav powers. Little clock on a chain around his neckβ¦ the shabby Eye of Agamodo.
#monsterdon hey chat, does Megalon hate all infrastructure projects or does he have specific beef with power dams
speedy edit: OK dams and bridges apparently
Dam cool special effects
LMAO that was Fleetwood's short-lived henchman days, before he met Stevie and hit it big
#monsterdon These Kaiju all fly like the repurposed tank vacuum cleaners they are.
Sad Trombone for the motorcycle guy who got drowned in white paint
I call this scene with the stairs, "We saw the Italian Job!"
#monsterdon ah, flooring it. Weβll get to 35mph at some point!
awww, I love the 'driving small cars down steep steps' trick! such fun!
This movie is a visual feast!
It has a story too which I am almost following. #monsterdon
This container is really good at bonking people on the head.
#monsterdon The Seatopian assailant with the floppy haircut currently being bonked against the lab floor has a certain Alan Rickman quality to his bonelessness.
#monsterdon looks like that man is playing βOperationβ I hope he has nerves of steel!
#monsterdon
I want that Megalon guy as my Xmas tree topper. Glowing star top plus Godzilla choppers.
So, that's what a Megalon looks like. I never knew.
That's not how wings and flight work but then I'm not going to argue with Megalon
'Seatopia' is how every Tech Bros envisions their fiefdoms but not as glittery
#monsterdon stopped gently by a car door. And just picked up. No flailing or screaming. Thatβs just American kids apparently.
Jet is a black mineral. They've named the robot Black Jaguar. It is Red, Blue and Yellow.
And he has a micro scooter too. This kid gets all the best toys.
70s Man smokes right next to the new robot in the lab
This is clearly the movie The Venture Bros based the Dr Venture/Brock Samson relationship on, but more comedically dysfunctional of course.
#monsterdon Giant city-stompulating abominations created by nuclear testing are one thing, but the real monsters knee-strike kids in the face.
WTF with those hanging cubes? is it supposed to be art?
OMG this looks like a live-action version of the Mazinger headquaters
#monsterdon they donβt know, and they do. These subtitles are going to be part of the comedy.
@Zerofactorial despite the monster attacks, it's a happier timeline #monsterdon
OMG THE JET JAGUAR MUSIC IS A BEAT it screams 1970s. can't believe i forgot all about it
@Lazarou @RobynGoodfellow It drives home the point that things born from human creativity must never be replaced by AI. That's my take anyway #monsterdon
@RobynGoodfellow @Zerofactorial "Have you ever been as high as this?"
It's a Godzilla classic! #monsterdon
Is there a way to submit films for inclusion on the weekly voting list? I'd love to see something like Phase IV (ant hive mind versus scientists) or A Boy and His Dog on the list. Just check out this trailer and tell yourself these aren't something we can riff off.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTck2RnpPy4
@strangefour What is up with that guy's forelock updo hairstyle in the scupted silvery artwork? Or is that updo a massive tiara? #Monsterdon #GodzillaVsMegalon
BRB gonna hang some attack cubes in the foyer. #Monsterdon
@Louisa does the bitter old woman doing the kid's voice in the English dub count? I know I'm grasping at straws here though #Monsterdon
@moira @diazona @Taweret@octodon.social MEGALON! #monsterdon
I think the lesson we all learned here is that you should learn semaphore.
What happened to the Seatopians? #Monsterdon
π¦ #MONSTERDON Goodbye
Thanks to our host @Taweret for this Kaiju Smackdown! Exhausting! The timeline has just been a blur!
And thanks to Bingo maven @cheribaker
And to tonight's high-quality commentary from the Real Time Film Analysis Squad. Really fun!
π¨ If you can, get your Monsterdon merchandise! There is great stuff!! I think there is a sale now!! π
https://thediremushrump.threadless.com/designs/monsterdon-doodles-color/mens/t-shirt/extra-soft
there were no women in this movie but there were two asexual gay dads so
yknow
mixed bag on representation
@ShiitakeToast "Let the Singularity be somebody else's problem son, your father and I are tired" #monsterdon
Wow.
Just.
Wow.
What an extraordinarily silly film! Oodles of fun, certainly! But, like, the Seatopians decided to take a break from their Studio 54 orgy of silver lamΓ© & interpretive dance, because... why?
And send monsters & take control of robots to wage war on the surface dwellers... because?
And the robot can just make itself kaiju-sized... how?
I get it - it's #monsterdon - it don't have to make a lick of sense. This one certainly didn't! +
The moral of the story is that in a world devoid of women guys can still manage to get things done albeit in a slapdash fashion with a lot of questions going unanswered #monsterdon
So we blew up some bombs, made some ocean dwelling Gay White Boys angry, who sent us up the Kaiju for great destruction, but they were dispatched by Godzilla and his new physics defying robot friend and
THE END
...I guess that is a plot?
Well at least it had an indestructible kid in shorty shorts, a soundtrack by Vince Guaraldi on mushrooms and world class Kaiju Wrestling
Thanks for another delightful #Monsterdon @Taweret !
I think there have been WWII movies set entirely on the front lines with more women in them than this
love the queer poly found family ending #monsterdon
thank you @Taweret i loved this, it was a movie
And in the end, all the Kaiju fucked off into ... somewhere? ..., Jet Jaguar programmed himself to be little and also subservient again and Tokyo was safe for cartoon jetskis and tiny motorcycles ... FOR NOW
oo, that car came in a great blue color! #grabbyHands #monsterdon
I cannot explain any of that but this may have been (close to?) my favorite #Monsterdon ever
Thanks @Taweret for hosting and thanks everyone for the commentary!
so a REALLY badly dubbed kid and his gay dads' pet robot get kidnapped because the alien merpeople also want the robot but Professor Utonium Gay Dad manages to talk to pet robot and get him to go get Cookie Monster Godzilla
Hard to believe there has only been one Jet Jaguar movie. C'mon Toho, give us another one! That was fun. Goodnight, Monster People!
Underwater Sean Connery and his company of alien merpeople got mad for good reason (atomic testing) and sent up one kaiju to fuck around with a country that doesn't actually have any atomic weapons
I could not tell you anything about that film. That movie just passed through me like a phantom. Was there a plot? Themes? Characters? I watched it, but I honestly have no clue. #Monsterdon
Well, that was silly. And nonsensical. But short! #monsterdon