...Chief, the PHONE didn't work, what makes you think the ancient gun will? #Monsterdon

"I believe what my brain tells me to believe" #monsterdon

Oh, YES, give the asshole a firearm. GREAT IDEA, MOVIE! :blobcatgooglytrash:

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon 👿 👧 🤖 🪐 🚀 🌏 👀 🕴️ 🕴️ 😱

Oh no the Professor has Head Bonked the Invisible Wall!

director: so the movie is about this statuesque dominatrix all dressed in black latex who comes to earth from mars-

studio exec: we don't make porn films

director: no no, it's not like that!

studio exec: okay go on

director: anyway, the dominatrix wants to kidnap all the men for sex-

#monsterdon

He only just had the best sex of his 70-odd winters
#monsterdon

@brooke "I tested it with my FACE"

#monsterdon

#monsterdon I'm gonna get super strong so alien women will abduct me

ugh Michael is rapidly becoming exponentially more annoying

#Monsterdon

@brooke https://xkcd.com/242/
#monsterdon

That triangular wall is giving me anxiety.

#monsterdon

"letting my hair down"
and your accent sir. pick one. #monsterdon

@wohali they've seen a visitor from another planet and all they can talk about is their personal drama #monsterdon

Honestly, DevilGirl should just approach the women quiet-like and ask for a list of men that they are free to take.

I can think of several. We could fool her into thinking they are prime specimens. She can pick equally from billionaires and politicians

#Monsterdon

Yeah Michael, you're an alcoholic, not a scholar or a poet

#Monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

Smoking and drinking a plenty, but I feel like we are in for another movie with low coffee content.
#Monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

#Monsterdon tell a scientist you made an invisible force field outside and he IMMEDIATELY goes out trying to find it

"It is an acquired taste. And I've acquired it."

*gag*

#Monsterdon

ah the drunken smartass #monsterdon

...Folks I don't mean to be a bitch but THERE IS A UFO OUTSIDE. Nobody cares about your relationship problems! #Monsterdon

"While we're still alive, we might as well have a cuppa tea."

So painfully British. 😂

#Monsterdon

statuesque dominatrices dont' just fall out of the sky

onto the old spooky moors

#monsterdon

She is gonna emancipate the women and take the men as breeding stock this Martian lady kicks ASS! #Monsterdon

This invisible wall sure is convenient for a play but is not welcome in a movie.

#Monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

while we're still alive we may as well have a cup of tea

preach it mother

#monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

@diazona lol, every time #monsterdon

I like how the people on Mars also evolved to value capes and good hoisery

#Monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

"I'm a scientist, I believe what my brain tells me to believe. Like when my brain told me to believe the machine elves were against thinking machines, and to destroy Turing!"

#Monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

@Lazarou #TeamMonster

#Monsterdon

Mrs. Jamieson with the most practical take yet: “we need another bed!” #Monsterdon

Despite our advanced science, we have not figured out how babies are made. #monsterdon

@SordidAmok There were some alien invasion plans and such

#Monsterdon

Had to get the kettle. Hope I didn't miss anything important

#monsterdon

#monsterdon This is so rude, Space Vampira shows up, dental dam hat and all, at the bar like that and no one even even offers her a wee dram?

edit: hahaha "Oh, that'll mean another bed"

Our martian bullet bras are far in advance of your own, primitive earth bras

#Monsterdon

"Our males have fallen into decline; paunchy, and listening to crummy podcasts on Spotify. It's pathetic, really "

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon 👿 👧 🤖 🪐 🚀 🌏 👀 🕴️ 🕴️ 😱

All 1950s alien women have weird eyebrows <-- things I have learned from Monsterdons

"And now the male has fallen into decline," oh, girl don't get me started. #monsterdon

#Monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

"I am here for the sperm of your men"

#monsterdon

We need your earth sperm.

#Monsterdon

This movie goes way harder on the technobabble than I was expecting

#Monsterdon

the parameters of what an extraterrestrial lifeform must be capable of has dramatically changed since the 1950's, where then it was plausible for spaceships to be just like normal rocket craft made by species that can make trivial miscalculations and end up in scotland, but now it wouldn't read at all outside of a comedy for an alien to make a mistake like that because we understand that aliens would have to develop technology well outside our understanding of basic physics to travel to earth #monsterdon

This is some Chris Claremont shit.

#monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

oh no ew they need sperm. please tell me you're using a fancy alien baster, devil queen

#monsterdon

The devil girl's dialogue is just awful but the outfit makes up for EVERYTHING

#monsterdon

Her delivery is incredible but this exposition is terrible

#Monsterdon

"So there is a fourth dimensions"

My dude, you mean TIME!??!!?

#Monsterdon

"Your earth years" YES I LOVE IT

#Monsterdon

MARS NEEDS MEN #monsterdon

"Our women were once much like yours."
"English?"
#monsterdon

Oh, she's a Martian Gloria Steinem. #Monsterdon

The exposition is coming at an advanced rate.

Also, isn't this what Tech Bros believe will happen if they're not allowed to be ridiculous boy-men?

#monsterdon

Bechdel pass? #monsterdon #devilgirlfrommars

She's got a mechanical Johnny!

#Monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

All planets have wars. Just like all planets have a North.
I can almost hear her creaking with every step.
#Monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

Johnny the robot. Of course.

#monsterdon

Sex War!

This keeps getting better!

#monsterdon

"All inhabited planets have had wars. Some have ended by wiping themselves out"

#monsterdon

lol, "War of the Sexes"

Hetereos.....

#monsterdon

WAR OF THE SEXES TAKEN TO THE LOGICAL EXTREME

#Monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

Wow, that’s a lot of monologuing.

#monsterdon

there's a robot??

#monsterdon

There should be a hypnosis square on every Monsterdon bingo card. It comes up a lot. A LOT!

#monsterdon

"The course was set for London"

Well, there's no accounting for taste.

#Monsterdon

Alien to Scottish person: Of course I speak English, you're English aren't you?

<everyone stands back>

#Monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

Jeez NOBODY in this universe can read maps

#monsterdon

"My name is Naya." I live on the second floor. I live upstairs from you. #Monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

His eye glasses survived! Eye glasses are impervious to Mars rays! Quick, get me a giant pair of eyeglasses! We must armor ourselves against her heat ray!

#monsterdon

"You men on Earth are much as we expected." Ouch?

#monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

Space Dracula err Devil Girl is here. And the music is announcing her as loudly as possible.
#Monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

"My name is Naia."

I hope you don't mind I left my U-Haul in your driveway. #Monsterdon

okay yeah, she's got the entrance thing down

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon they speak English on Mars.

"She can't see us! She can't hear us!"

"Now's the perfect time for us to kiss and she will NEVER KNOW!"

#monsterdon

doris has read the rest of the script. #monsterdon

The Kettledrum of DOOOOOMMMMM

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon Vaporized the body, but left the dinky little glasses. Sure.

Lady, that outfit and entrance was worth the pain, trust me.
Just needed an 80s synth pop soundtrack

#monsterdon

a devil girl at last!?

A devil girl at last, 25 minutes into a 75 minute movie called devil girl from mars

#monsterdon

Enter: devil girl, to the sound of kettle drums

#monsterdon

why'd the glasses stay; but none of the rest of his clothes/shoes/etc?
#monsterdon

Eat laser earth boy!

#monsterdon

Please allow me to introduce myself
I'm a girl of Martian taste
I've come here from far far away
To steal your men's souls and ... other things

Pleased to meet you
Hope you can guess my name
But what's puzzlin' you
Is the nature of my game.

#Monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

#monsterdon WE've got our MTF Shabby Darth Vader, so that's that.

love those shoulderpads #monsterdon

okay, she knows how to make an entrance at least

#monsterdon

The occupant of the UFO is pretty hot all on her own, I see...

#Monsterdon

KNEEL BEFORE ZOD! #monsterdon

The Devil Girl cometh ALL HAIL

#Monsterdon

SHE HAS ARRIVED.

#monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

@Taweret hoping that in the end they all fuck off into the old spooky moors

#monsterdon

@justabean no, this is a movie. this is nuts:

#monsterdon #DevilGirlFromMars

@CactuarJoe every #monsterdon needs more #Muppets :kermit_shout:

Yes Ireland is so primitive, they have no border control

#monsterdon

you could grow a mustache, I could go for a mustache ride. Oh Albert, it'll be perfect!

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon 👿 👧 🤖 🪐 🚀 🌏 👀 🕴️ 🕴️ 😱

I'll bet there's a devil girl doing something interesting right now

You know what this scene needs? Muppets. #Monsterdon

Wait, is this going to be like those Aztec zombie movies?

#monsterdon

"When I first met you, I thought you were stuck up, but you're really not"

Don't let the murderer tell you you're not like other girls!

#Monsterdon