What year is it?!

#monsterdon

Wait am I supposed to have a favorite in this race?

#monsterdon

Okay we're gonna drown in satire aren't we?
Nice Howard Cosell sound alike there.
#Monsterdon #DeathRace2000

holy shit the synth organ slightly-offkey Star-Spangled Banner

#Monsterdon

The Navigator position became necessary after the Great GPS failure of 1999. #monsterdon

How will I distinguish between flying and soaring for my #Monsterdon bingo card‽ #DeathRace2000

Can’t believe they got the real Frankenstein for this race. What a huge celebrity cameo!

#monsterdon

Frankenstein has a cape?
I love these wacky cars. Very 70s tokusatsu.
#Monsterdon #DeathRace2000

I love the lion car omg

#Monsterdon

This is some goofy-ass shit for sure

#monsterdon

So this movie is the bastard child of Cannonball Run and Wacky Races?
#Monsterdon #DeathRace2000

POV you the person in that tuba to the face meme

#monsterdon

smaug breathing rankin bass brand flame to doom metal is pretty delicious

#monsterdon

Plus, my BINGO card is pretty much completely filled in!

Edit: I should have filled in "Tailpipe" for a 5th BINGO.

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonBingo

Nope. I gotta headache. No more metal for me.
Good night Monsterdonians everywhere.
#Monsterdon #TheHobbitonWeed

Trolls 🧌

#monsterdon #monsterdondoublefeature #miru

y'all i can't not watch the rankin bass hobbit dopesmoker

https://miru.miyaku.media/

#Monsterdon

are they having Second Breakfast?

#monsterdon #BakedPotato #WrongRace

@ramsey @miru #monsterdon #BakedPotato #WrongRace

Apparently it's The Hobbit with "Dopesmoker by Sleep" played over it? idk...

@catzilla I had to look that up, and uh yeah.

#Monsterdon

So the guy who killed the president, in front of a huge live crowd, hangs around. He puts his hand in the air on live TV. The entire security detail guarding the president is like "Meh, I guess we work for that guy now..."

He's not arrested, not shot. Not even detained as a person of interest. Because, let's face it, none of us had any interest in him. It's fine. Everyone's like "yep, I guess that's what happens."
#monsterdon

I was watching Miru’s stream, and now it’s the old Hobbit animated movie but with a rock band???

#Monsterdon

Something weird with Hobbits now on https://miru.miyaku.media/ #monsterdon

#monsterdon #BakedPotato

shoulda been on the soundtrack: Ministry, "Jesus Built my HotRod"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rmenTtGe_6I

I mean, the political appointments here in the conclusion might make more sense than the current ones.

ow.

ow ow ow.

#monsterdon

Oh god. The movie thinks it has a MESSAGE 🤮 #Monsterdon

The first #Monsterdon of 2026 is in the can!

Thanks to @Taweret for hosting, and racing us into the new year!

Tonight's feature, #DeathRace2000, from 1975, was a kind of Speed Racer, Mad Max, Judge Dredd, and Cannonball Run fever dream mashup. We also had,

Were there dueling musical editors?

#monsterdon

"President Frankenstein, you can't call off the race!"

#Monsterdon

President has gotta be worth a lot of points

#Monsterdon

Wow this failed stabbing and shooting and car crash is some Gundam level political theater.
#Monsterdon #DeathRace2000

What even the is this "music"???

#Monsterdon

Just all sentimental violins and clarinets--oboes?--as they careen towards the cliff's edge.

#Monsterdon

I guess they handed it to Stallone there.

#monsterdon

You're gonna have to shift the gears for me now ;)
#monsterdon #deathrace2000

okay now one of you needs to start the power slide to get boost out of the corner

#monsterdon

I love you, Frankenstein

#Monsterdon

"...it's not over yet"

Oh, but can it be? Please?

#Monsterdon #DeathRace2000

She's been in the resistance for 20 years? Not doing a great job lady. #monsterdon

#monsterdon They have all the timing cred of Imperial Stormtroopers. hahahahah

This plane guy is really bad at his job
#monsterdon #deathrace2000

Devil

Boy

From

Mars!!

#Monsterdon

It's Cherokee Jack!

#Monsterdon

I guess that microphone stand base is suppossed to be some sort of mine? #Monsterdon

Contort yourself

#monsterdon #deathrace2000

Mercurochrome blood and robin's-egg eyeshadow. Whew!!

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon She lays on those satin sheets only the way someone suffering from severe scoliosis can lay on satin sheets.

#Monsterdon

@saucerlost I don't quite understand how that even works

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Well, there we go, full titties. Now the body count will soar. It'd be funny if they remixed this with the force of death from Final Destination, where it's signature song is Yakkity Sax.

Was the background music picked entirely by spinning the Wheel of Fortune

#Monsterdon

@JoeWynne Sooooo much better than Rollerball!

#monsterdon #deathrace2000

Violently attacked by a green bucket
#monsterdon #deathrace2000

#monsterdon NO CAPES! LOL

🦃 #monsterdon #deathrace2000

ok but how come the president has a canadian accent are we sure he isn't french #monsterdon

My favorite part of any race is the seated meal

#Monsterdon

Did you go around my helmet!?
#monsterdon

Aww Stallone has a cute little outfit on for the dance.
#Monsterdon #DeathRace2000

So what was the point of Frankenstein making Annie (his navigator) drive

#Monsterdon #DeathRace2000

Oooooh so that was the plan! It still doesn't make any sense #monsterdon #DeathRace2000

I'm kind of having difficulty imagining that this was a theatrical release: people actually paid money and went to the cinema to see this? 🧐

#monsterdon

Ah yes. The Loony Toons schools of road detours! #Monsterdon #DeathRace2000

Sorry I stepped away for a bit to make a coffee did I mess anything important?

No?

Okay then

#Monsterdon

That was some Loony-Toons ass shit right there.

#Monsterdon #DeathRace2000

Oh man I'm so glad we don't have stage-managed news now where the President tells people what to say on the news. #Monsterdon

The Acme props right out of Wiley Coyote! #Monsterdon

@diazona i guess you're right, though i bet the birthrate along the race corridor would be booming as people adapt to a K-selection strategy.
#monsterdon

now I'm thinking Road Runner inspired this film
#monsterdon

The violins are so far the best part
#monsterdon

"scores" is arguably less awkward than "unalive"

#monsterdon #DeathRace2000

Bingo!

#monsterdon
#DeathRace2000

“Nobody scores my navigator and gets away with it.”

#Monsterdon

This all became a little too real to be funny. #monsterdon

Okay now roll as the car passes between you and the camera. #monsterdon sterdon

#monsterdon The best and worst part of this movie is that it has more hope than our current shit-show, and this is fucking awful. So, ow…

There's a fauxcanstein. #monsterdon

The Fonzie Fan Club has made its entrance.
#monsterdon

🦖#MONSTERDON 🎞️

⁉️ DEATH TRIVIA 2000🪦🚗🏁

Roger Corman is proud of this film because people to this day talk about getting points for hitting pedestrians, and it all started with Death Race.

#DeathRace2000

Somebody wrote this script and kept thinking these were all good ideas.

#monsterdon #DeathRace2000

decoy greasers

#Monsterdon

"What else did they replace?"

His penis presumably and I'm only shocked in that they hadn't alluded to that sooner. #monsterdon

@Binder the cleanest dirty dancing

#monsterdon

A tale as old as time

#Monsterdon

It's becoming increasingly clear the bodybuilders aren't coming back and I'm rapidly losing interest. #monsterdon

luxurious hotel conference room bedroom

#Monsterdon

I understand your feelings aw
#monsterdon #deathrace2000

David Carradine made his own costume for this role. In fact they asked him to tone it down but he refused. #monsterdon

Hair taped to boobs, it was in her contract

#monsterdon

#monsterdon And then not to be outdone by "Final Solution" fffaaaaackkkkk

Death Race 8008135 #monsterdon #DeathRace2000

#monsterdon Yes, apparently we're doing phrasing. Master Race huh? Bold words... hahahahaha yuck.

"Remember you're on TV!"

Which is why we're showing everyone your tits! #Monsterdon

Stallone's acting, he never got it
#monsterdon #deathrace2000

Boobs. And Stallon butt. Nice.
Nazi tattoos? Very not nice.
#Monsterdon #DeathRace2000

@flowerpot

Oh dear. I saw that not too long after it came out. It was...certainly an experience....

#Monsterdon
#DeathRace2000

@nantucketlit

That’s ironic because this feels about as subtle as Beyond the Valley of the Dolls

#monsterdon #deathrace2000

#Monsterdon

why did they raise that blockade? they could have just blocked it with their bellbottom pants.

#monsterdon

The Bipartisan Party 🤔 Sounds familiar

#Monsterdon